The only thing on my mind lately...

I really want to write and express myself in a healthy way but I want to cut as well. My emotions overwhelm me and I don't know what to do.

All I can think about is smoking and lying to people, my heart is fucked up and I could die but I continue to live a fake lonely life.

All I wanna do is throw up these days but everyone is counting on me not to. I can't take the pressure.