Wannarexic?
I just want to start this off with an apology to everyone, I guess.
I don't know if this goes here, but I want to be open on this forum/community so here goes.
I have a thinspo blog. I track calories, sometimes try to restrict, sometimes successfully restrict, sometimes try to (unsuccessfully) purge; I know a lot of girls who have ED's and the attention they get and the weight lost and...
I know eating disorders are not a phase, a lifestyle choice, a diet, a choice in general, etc, they are real serious illnesses that kill and destroy lives.I feel guilty about these behaviors but I still do them. I post the most on the blog when I feel self-hating, "fat", insecure, etc.
I think I'm just getting this off my chest, and if it doesn't belong in this topic feel free to move it or delete it. I'm feeling low today and very over-sharing.
I used to do this too, and I have to say, the best way to stop is to stop counting calories. It was hard for me to stop counting calories, and even after I stopped writing down the numbers, I could still do the math in my head. Letting the numbers go is the best way to let the behaviors go. Just eat healthy foods and let yourself be unhealthy from time to time.
Many people get the feeling as if they are fake, or unimportant,in comparison to many other people dealing with a similar mental illness. The truth of the matter is everyone experiences things differently, just because someone may have it worse off, does not make your feelings any less valid.
That is how I felt. I felt like because I am a normal weight range, I am not anorexic, but someone who... has all the traits, but isn't, therefore I didn't need help. I'm deluding myself. I excessively restrict, exercise when malnourished, am obsessive about calories, weight loss, body image... I've had my eating disorder diagnosed for two years now. It started out innocently, and snowballed. I keep telling myself that since I am not underweight I don't need help, that others are worse off.