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If Your Pets (or Imaginary Pets) Could Talk for One Day, What’s the First Thing They’d Roast You About?

User Profile: SkyeBanfeild
SkyeBanfeild January 9th

Let’s be honest — our pets see EVERYTHING. The midnight fridge raids, the “dance parties” when no one’s watching, the way we talk to our plants…

If your pet (dog, cat, hamster, fish, or even your totally real imaginary dragon) suddenly gained the ability to speak for 24 hours, what’s the very first thing they’d call you out on? Be specific. Bonus points for quoting their exact savage words. 🐶🐱🦜

I’ll start: My cat would look me dead in the eye and say, “You’ve been ‘working from home’ for three hours and haven’t moved from the couch once. I’ve seen you refresh the same three tabs 47 times. Get it together, human.”

Your turn! What brutal truth is your pet holding in?

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User Profile: Amanda84
Amanda84 January 9th

@SkyeBanfeild

They'd probably talk about my glorious dance skills and the tireless way I perfect every move 😂😂😂

User Profile: Nailaaaa
Nailaaaa January 9th

@SkyeBanfeild

Probably how late I wake up on weekends 😂

User Profile: Tinywhisper11
Tinywhisper11 January 9th

@SkyeBanfeild mayo is my unicorn, mayo neighs😁 he would not roast me but he would complain sooooo much. 

Mayo " why do you never take me home, I want to go back to visit mane street!?!! Why do you shave my eyebrows!?! I like my uni-brow!!! Stop eating pop corn that's my dad😭 you monster!!!!! "

User Profile: scarletBalsam388
scarletBalsam388 January 10th

@SkyeBanfeild 

My cow will probably complain about that I don't give her enough neck rubs and try to hug her even though she doesn't like it.