Hopeless but trying
I'm so ready to just finally give up. I don't see the point in trying so hard anymore. I live in immense pain daily with no relief. I have epilepsy on top of that which has just about taken all of my memory which is depressing on its own. I'm trying to take care of 3 babies with one on the way. Financially we're struggling a bit and me not being able to contribute makes me feel so worthless. Everyone says "oh you got this" but what if I just don't want it anymore? Then I'm selfish but the few people I have around just don't understand how miserable everyday is. I just don't know what to do anymore.
@Dvincent87
Hi! You are sounding overwhelmed. You have a lot to deal with every day, with pain, epilepsy, babies and financial stress. That is a lot of big things all at once, and they need your full attention 24/7. Do you think that giving full time (24/7) childcare is contributing? As a single parent I have worked and not worked, and I found that when I worked our expenses went up by a lot, because there was no one home to do anything, we had to buy more things/services. Plus childcare and house help costs are HUGE. I am sorry to hear you are feeling worthless because of not working, I wonder if you can find any value in your role of raising little humans? I know it can be hard to see things that way when you are sleep-deprived, overwhelmed, stressed, and struggling to cope with it all. It can seem impossible to find time to manage your mental health on top of everything. Do you have people around you to help out in practical ways? Either to just get jobs done, or to make getting them done more enjoyable/fun (with some understanding company). What kind of help would be useful to you, and what are some ways you could get it? Are you in some mum groups for support/tips?That sounds pretty frustrating when people don't understand and hear you properly. Saying 'you got this' isn't very helpful when you are feeling you haven't 'got this'. Big hugs. 💛
