2-5-16. I snapped tonight.
I haven't felt this level of anger and sadness since I punched a hole in the wall. I got so upset at myself. For overthinking everything. For not being confident in myself. For not loving myself. For not even knowing who I was. It felt like I was just living a lie. Like I was living one big farce on a crappy sitcom.
In truth, no, I still don't know who I am, what I want out of this life, or why I'm on this freaking ball of dirt to begin with. NOTHING! All I can do is scream inside my head, cry, punch a while, and collapse. It's like I'm trying to stare at my reflection at a mirror that was shattered on the ground. Never a whole, clear reflection. Just a reflection in the f***ing shards that remain.
You know what? Screw this week. School can take a back seat for once. I want to know who I am. I want to do something with myself, even if it means going into the unknown. I want to DO SOMETHING. I'm losing my mind in college. I reapplied to the internship that I didn't get last time, and this time, if I get an interview, I'm going to own it.
Ho
@Nick8876
I think I replied to another post of yours somewhere? Hmm.
The thing about self discovery is evident in its wording, self-discovery. No roadmaps or tips, just go out there, do you and maybe you'll get lucky. Otherwise, try something else but just keep trying.
Yeah, go own that interview if you get. Total domination.
(and yes, college also tends to suck at times. Been there, done that. Haha)