I feel like a 40 year old trapped in a 20 year old's body.
I know this sounds weird, but it's true. I am having like a mid life crisis at the age of 20. I graduated college at 19, I am now a professional graphic designer and I am 1 month away from starting my own business. Well, this, on top of a few other things I have accomplished, makes it seem like I am doing great! Deep own though, I still feel like a failure.
My family always compares me to my uncle. He purchased land, a home, and a truck, AND moved out by the age of 20 or 21 I think it was. They want me to be just like him and do everything he did. He pretty much works all the time. He did nothing but school and work in high school. I didn't want to work myself to death and I had major depression in school and didn't have the energy to work anyway.
My last year in high school, I was in school, also taking online college classes, and I had a job for the Christmas season. Well, when the job was over, my family was disappointed when I didn't want to get another job yet. They think I have no work ethic at all. (I have had other jobs since then.)
I feel like a failure because everyone says I should be on my own by now. I mean yes, I am starting a business by myself. But, I'm still not making an income and I am not on my own. I don't want to feel this way anymore. I want to feel like I am where I am supposed to be and not like I am a disappointment.
Hello there @Zethnos ☺
A very big warm welcome to 7 cups ☺. Very pleased your here.
I would actually like to congratulate your good self because I think you have done incredibly well to get to where you are today ☺ so well done mate, you've done a fine job!
I think at times we are often compared with family members, however I try to accept it's my families way of encouraging me, pushing me to reach my goals and fill potential. I also think it's very important not to let ourselves get carried away by their encouragement! You are your own person, this is your life to live how you see fit, and I think your going a tremendous job so far!☺
You are head strong, hard working and ambitious, you should be very proud of your achievements so far..... I know I am ☺
Well done mate, and the very best of luck with your new business. ..whoo whoooo!!
@professionalPerspective60 @Zethnos
Building on top of what professionalP has stated, it appears that you are suffering from the adaptation-level phenomenon which basically states that people are quick to become used to something they previously desired and thought would give them happiness. You have stated yourself all your accomplishments, yet, you now seem them as being the norm. Instead, you should look at what you accomplished and be proud of where you are and think, rather, about where you would be had you not worked as hard as you have to end up where you are now. Another thing that you seem to be suffering from is relative deprivation. Relative deprivation is the tendency for people to compare themselves to those who they see as superior to the, which causes a feeling of disappointment. A thing to note from this is that comparing oneself to those below actually helps build confidence. Instead of comparing yourself to your uncle, and only your uncle, also compare yourself to those below you who you worked to get past.
