Struggling
At first I though I had it under control. But then these thoughts came back. These intrusive thought that I can't control. And then the anxiety attacks started increasing in frequency. I just don't know what to do anymore. I think some of the issues were cause because I was out out of soccer and gymnastics for so long. Stupid brother. Stupid orthopedic boot. Stupid crutches. Stupid anxiety disorders. Stupid depression. I feel so stuck. Like nothing will ever change. My thoughts are constantly racing and I have no way to stop them. I'm always really jumpy and on edge. And for some reason its getting worse this week. All I can hope for now is that people will either notice and ask or just not notice.
Please only encouraging comments. I don't want people trying to take over this post. Thanks -- Mae
I don't know if my words even make sense before. But I think this better describes how I'm feeling. Its a poem I wrote.
Suicidal Ideations
Alive,
But am I?
Choices,
No more,
Up to me.
Not anymore.
At least,
Not now.
All I have
Are:
Do-or-die
Situations.
Because
There is
No stopping.
With these
Crazy
Suicidal
Ideations.
I feel so stuck. Constant anxiety. No sleep. Anorexia. Depression.
