The Second Half of June is International Semicolon Celebration Half-Month

Dear friends,

you've been waiting in suspense; it's a suspense that overwhelms you; it creates a tension deep within your colon.

Wikpediadescribes the semicolon as: "a punctuation mark that separates major sentence elements."

It doesn't tell you that THE SEMICOLON WILL BLOW YOUR MIND.

It does say: "a semicolon can be used two closely related clauses, provided they are not already joined by a coordinating conjunction."

It does not say, A SEMICOLON IS THE SENSIBLE SOLUTION TO SAVE YOUR STORY FROM SINKING IN TO A SEA of DIS-COORDINATION.

Some will always say the semicolon

Is half of something great

They don't know which way they're rollin'

And haters gonna hate

The semicolon is nayjust a comma and a dot

It pulls together your dapper drama

Like lamb stew within a porcelain pot.

Give me not a colon, when a semi will do just fine

It will connect my shambolicdreck line; by line; by line

Festivities for this punctuationbacchanalia include:

--connecting related ideas not better conjoined by other means

--throwing rotten tomatoes at burning effigies of notable semicolon haters (e.g. Kurt Vonnegut, James Joyce, Samuel Beckett, et al.)

--a ceremony: The Mocking of the Colon

--for the kiddos: an inflatable rumpus room filled with semi-inflated, semicolon shaped bouncy things

AND REMEMBER...JULY IS...ELIPSES...MONTH...SO...DO NOT FORGET...TO DOT...DOT...DOT YOUR WAY OVER.