The (not so) Art of Feeling too Much
Emotions.
The vain of my existence, but one of my greatest qualities. My ability to feel, I have alwaysbeen told, gives me a great capacity for love. But love hurts. Love skins your knees and bruises your cheeks. Sometimes I feel on top of the world, as if I am getting better. As if things are changing. Then the darkness comes. And I'm numb, wishing I was never born and realizing that I have made too many mistakes that hurt not only myself, but others. I have hurt the people I care most for. But then there's just the tears. The littlest things make me sob, feeling lonely and left out. I'm not sad, but I can't help but be hurt by even small things like my boyfriend saying he has to go and he would talk to me later. I try to tell people, tell them the things they would understand, but I can't tell them everything. I feel too much. I feel to a great extent, where if my emotions were to form together, they would create a universe. I want to shut it off. I want to shut me off.
I'm sorry you feel this way. Have you heard the term highly sensitive person before? Hsp's feel the world at lot more intensely than the majority of the population. Down to the point that we can take someone brushing us offas a slight to our own character. It hurts us deeply and we tend to wonder what we did. The thing is, people who aren't hsp's don't see that, they don't see the things they do can't hurt us a lot more easily than others. I hope you a wonderful day and that you feel better too.
