Venting about the same issues

Hi my name is Kim, I am 20, I'm in college, and I am slowly starting to spiral back into a really bad state of mind and it's really hard to stop it.
You see I had a pretty messed up childhood. Divorced parents, meth head father, a revolving door of my mother boyfriends, dad got sent to jail then got really sick, and let's just say I really hated one of my moms boyfriends. When I told my mother the truth of what was happening just like every cliche ever she didn't believe me and chose to take his side. Here I am 8 years later and I still have so much pain and anger towards my mom. I mean what kind of mother doesn't believe their 12 year old daughter. The only reason I am safe today is because my older sister who had already moved out stuck up for me and kicked him out of the house. Even after that my mom still continued to see him. It's like she had no idea or just didn't care about all the pain she was causing me to go through. The only reason she even stopped seeing the guy is because when I was 15 my brother and his wife got pregnant and they threatened my mom saying that if she didn't get this guy out of her life she would never be able to see the baby.
Here I am years later still wishing for an apology, for remorse, for her to understand what she put me through instead of acting like it never happened.