im new

IDK if i should add a TW, i will be talking about depression, anxiety, family issues, sexuality, etc. I want to include a quick disclaimer to clarify that I am at least 18 years old. Please take into account that there are cultural factors at play in my situation.

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I am reaching out to this online community seeking support and understanding as I find myself in a difficult situation at home. I have been battling depression and anxiety which has only been exacerbated by my current situation.

One of the major issues I am facing is my mother's shame and judgment towards my sexuality. Her adherence to a strict purity culture mentality has led to conflicts and emotional turmoil. In a distressing incident, she crossed my boundaries by going through my personal belongings despite my explicit request not to do so. This invasion of privacy left me feeling violated and emotionally devastated. She had a very intense reaction to finding a vibrator i had purchased less than a week ago and threw it away. This act not only undermined my autonomy but also worsened my emotional state. It has become clear that my parents' closed-mindedness and lack of acceptance are taking a toll on my mental and emotional well-being. A lot was said but she basically shamed me, saying that masturbation made me less valuable to her, and that i should keep my hymen intact for my future husband who will want me to be “pure”.

Today, I have experienced hurtful and derogatory language from my mother, who has staunchly refused to reconsider or change her beliefs. I tried talking to her and she called me stupid, dumb, etc for not believing what she believes. These experiences have been deeply distressing for me and have added to the challenges I face. I kindly request that forum members approach our discussions with empathy and respect, refraining from engaging in similar behavior.

I feel isolated and trapped, I hope I can find supportive people here.