my life right now

i dont know where my earlier thread has gone to so im just writing a new one,just want to write how is my life,i made friends i loved them very much but they left so i was in depression i took pills and when i finally started to accept loneliness my closest friend came back and i was weak so i trusted and loved her so much and now she again left,i have no strength now to overcome again.i have a problem whenever i am stressed i have acid reflux ,and due to past 40 days i have ulcers,h pylori and migraines .At first i used to cry and beg for help now i have accepted it i keep crying in pain i cant eat food because of acid and if i dont do it hurts more and if i do i vomit everything.i was right i was meant to be alone.my college has started and arleady i cant talk much to anyone so yeah my daily routine has changed from expecting and begging my friend to come back to just crying alone ,i just cant understand whats happening everyday doctor tells me a new problem new pain today i was warned of urine infection(i know it sounds weird but yeah too acidic stomach) so yeah pain,crying,watching my best friends sharing amazing stories on insta,sorry if i sound like a negative person but im trying my best