Day's One Line A Day

I am frustrated with listener not respecting my boundaries around not giving advice. this really triggers me and makes me feel upset that I was seeking support and just met with someone who bulldozed my boundaries.

It's really obnoxious for some one to say you're being too hard on yourself. that damn I just went through a really traumatic thing. to feel guilty is normal and honestly it is important to reflect on what we could do better. Of course all sorts of feelings are going to come up in this situation, guilt, anger, and sadness, and all those feelings are human and welcome here. it's not my problem if you can't handle some one else's emotions. it's not my job to suppress them to please you.

I appreciate you reviewing the case with me and offering medical suggestions. I sincerely apologize for upsetting any of the staff. I definitely did not intentionally ignore anyone's suggestions and value everyone's input for suggestions from all nurses and doctors. I do my best to handle more difficult cases but can sometimes get overwhelmed and anxious as an inexperienced clinician and may have misheard or misunderstood. I think I simply need more support from senior doctors with those cases to grow into handling them more confidently,  which can be difficult when everyone is busy. Being a new grad is stressful and I also have personal and family struggles going on. I am happy to chat one on one with any staff member who has further feedback or concerns they want to discuss, but I just ask for some empathy and kindness for what it's like to be a new grad in these situations.

I am feeling a bit down today. Finished my taxes and cooked at least. I didn't finish my notes yet, I will have to do tomorrow afternoon unfortunately. I feel lonely today, I feel like I have gone to my anxious side where I feel lonely and have a hard time not reaching out more. I don't fully know how to cope with it. I also have many more things to do now the license is the next thing for sure and the apartment, sending in CE and stuff. I feel overwhelmed by the appointments all day and some of the harder more sad ones and how this is something we deal with every day, like I handled the medical aspect fine it's still the pace and dealing with cases like that so quickly is difficult. I feel lonely like who else can I talk to, especially as I am moving again unfortunately. I have no idea if this is a long term fit or not and now I have put aside exploring things to be with him for now . I am worried about him as to whether I upset him. I didn't want him to feel obligated to drink, however , I also don't want to babysit someone and would assume he can figure what he can handle or not.

I feel sad finding out that he doesn't like to go out. It makes me feel sad because I like him and my gut tells me that this is a huge dealbreaker. We'll see if we can compromise and it will depend on his ability to be willing to compromise. I am sensing maybe some untreated anxiety and trauma issues which seems to be always the case with men. They just get stuck and don't want to change. I just feel sad overall but I know I should try not to panic and see how things go, at least until the summer since this is a sign that it might not work. I was wanting to drive the 2 hours but for somebody who won't do anything but stay at home and watch netflix, that's not worth my time to me.

I think the cancel activated some abandonment triggers around reliability and like things with my brother, I will always be the one to reach out and it never changes. Once I messaged him please try to let me know if you're busy. But I just feel if I talk to him about it , he will just shut down or won't change because he won't go to therapy so I stopped reaching out to him and now here he is wanting to visit me and of course I got excited and talked about my cat but then he didn't respond again. I just feel so exhausted from people who act like this. Like if you are not interested, don't do this to me, don't avoid planning and put all the effort on me. I think we need to have a larger convo about planning and see if he can rise to the occassion, but I just don't know. I feel so lonely and kind of triggered.

It's hard to hear people say like let him plan the reschedule, if he doesn't then it might mean he isn't interested, cuz like what is happening? Maybe just doesn't feel well enough and needs some time. It's okay to feel how you feel. It's understandable that this would bring up things given your history, and also uncertainty about the overall dynamic, like is really just thick and thinks a woman would want to plan the first date but is fully capable of planning ahead or does he avoid planning ahead and being decisive with plans in general?

Hi there, are you okay? I'm not sure whether you're super sick or overwhelmed or you lost interest in me? Either way, I would appreciate some communication if it's more than 3-4 days. I've been pretty upset and anxious.