Heyyy, am I supposed to do thisss?
Yeaahhh now we can talk hereeee ! If u ever want to share anything u can just leave a msg hereeee !🤍
@forcefulBeach451
@cutegrapes
That's amazing!!! Wish you a wonderful day!! ❤️
@forcefulBeach451
Oh now that I just tought about it, I wanted to change my username as you already know, I want to keep beach because we all got used to it already, but I wanted to change forceful with something else but I'm not creative at allll, do you have any ideas?
Umm i am not that creative tbh !!!
Maybeee blissful or seraphic?! I mean they r kind of really postive!!! What do u think ?
@cutegrapes blissful is very nice! I think I might use that one!
Also I wanted to tell you one thing, I really hope you don't mind, but by looking at your profile, I came across your post in the thoughts sections, and I just started reading it a bit, if you don't want me to just tell me right away, and if that is the case, I'm really sorry about it
I just wanted to tell you that it was really sad to see you thinking all that, you're usually just so nice and lighthearted on the community rooms, you say that you're doing well, but seeing you suffering deep inside is very sad
I do relate as well to what you think, you already know that I'm basically alone, that I barely have any friends, let alone talk to them, and I want to help you as much as I can
You expressed how you got used to keep everything inside, afraid of being a burden or that other might think weird things of you, but I want to assure you, that you're everything but a burden for me, and that I could never think anything bad of you, whatever you would ever tell me, I did many mistakes as well, everyone does, I just want to help you and try to make your mood better, and to be someone you can talk to whenever something bad happens or you just need to talk
You often said how you just hoped you could talk to someone about it, I'm not in your life, I can't materially help you irl, but I'm always here for you, to listen, talk, give friendly advice, and help you in every way I can
In those notes you show how much you deeply feel things, how you always think before doing anything and you then overanalyze everything that happened, something I do as well, I really like you and the way you are, and I want to help you as much as I can to make you even just a bit happier
So, if you're comfortable and you're willing to, you can talk to me about absolutely anything, I would never ever judge you or think anything badly of you, and I'll be here for you to help in any way possible, anytime
I would truly love to help you ❤️
@forcefulBeach451
Wait did u actually wrote all this 😭😭😭 I have no wordsss like u srsly care this much thank you so muchhhh forr writing all this and caring this much like really 😭🤌🏻 I don't know what I did to have a friend like u 😭🤎
And i m okayyy dw!! It's like my journal i wrote every depressing thing there so that I can let it all out i like to talk alonee!!!! And i really don't mind u can read all that it's just i don't want my friends to see my this sideee!!
And I will shareeee fs!! And u can also share with meee I m also always here for u !!
U made me all lot happier by writing this really!
Thank youuuu soooo muchhhhhh 😭🤌🏻🤎 I might cry really !!!!!!
Obviously I wrote all that, I would write even more than that if it was necessaryyy, because I really care this much about you!!
And also that's so nice like thank you so muchhh!!!! It's me that I don't know what I did to have a friend like you, everytime I would write something long and thoughtful everyone would be annoyed by it, thinking I overthink and obsess about them and start to pull away but that's just how I ammm 😭😭
So it's me who thanks you a lot you're amazingg!!!
I just hope you'll always have less and less sad thoughts and that you can be overral happier because that is what you truly deserve!!!
Remember that whatever it is, I'm here for you and you can talk about it, and thank you for allowing me to open myself to youuu!! That's something I'm not used to really, and I'm glad to know that I made you happier with that! You made me happy many times and I hope that I can return you the favour at least a bittt
I'm truly so happy to be your friend, you're awesomeee thank you so muchhh!!! ❤️😭
Thank youuu so muchhhhhh 😭🤎
Srslyyyyy?! Damn I love when people express how they feel about u like every single detail... If u r my friend I willl literally write para for u... Explaining howww I lovee u !!!... U r not annoying or something srsly u areee tooo niceeeeee !!!!!
U don't need to thank me srslyyyy
Tysssmmm!!!; u tooooo!! 🤎
Tysmmm!! And yeah u helped me a lot there is no favour okay !! It's just friendship!!!!! And i m so happy to help u !!!! If I will be able to do that !
Same hereeeee!!!!😭🤎
Oh my god that's so cuteee!!!
I think it's a lot when just a single friend writes around like 10 lines for a message for my birthday but like paragraphs, I honestly don't think anyone ever woulddddd 😭😭
I would express my love towards you in many more paragraphs too as I already didd!!
Thank you so much you're so nice toooo!!!!!!
I'm glad to know that I helped you a lottt, that's awesome! And I'm so happy that you want to help and support me as well you're so kindd!!!
Yeaahhh!!
And uk what I know u like for few days only still i cam say that u r a really nice person they u haven't found ur kind of people till now.. and u will find them one day as thereee r justtt billions of people in world!!! And u r justt like a best friend anyone can have really!!!! 🤎 If u can care that much about meee who u don't even know... Thenn i can imagine how good person u areee uk !!!! And u deserve so muchhhhh 🤎
Tysmmm!!💓
I m heree too
That's just so sweet and cuteeeee thank youuuuuu!!!!! ❤️
I've known you just for few days as well but I can say for sure that you're truly awesome!!! You deserve amazing friends around you as welll!!!
And alsoo, I'm worried about some things for tomorrow and the days afterrr, I guess I'll just wait for you to be on the chat room because it's way easier to talk like that okayyy?
Well it's quite late already so I'll just text you all here
Starting from tomorrow, idk if you remember that my birthday has been on 2 April but yes, I'll celebrate it tomorrow so it's easier for others to come and so on
Just to let you understand, we were 24 in the class at the beginning of high school, I just kinda hated everyone, after 3 years we are 14, many failed or changed school, thankfully the worst ones, now there's only the people I bare and the ones I don't really like
The people I talk to in my class are like 6, and they're the only ones I consider my "friends", I invited only 5 of them for my party and 3 of them are coming
You might think, well that's nice!
But honestly, everytime I'm outside with anyone else, 99% of the time I just have to pretend to be someone I am not, sometimes I might not have to pretend, but just stop some parts of me from going out, but I think that's still a form of not truly being myself
So well, I'm not much comfortable with them, I'm a totally different person than them, like I swear I feel so much closer to you that I've known for few days than to them that I've known for 3 years and half
And idk, you know I'm on holidays rn so I didn't have to pretend for quite some days, knowing that tomorrow I'll be with them, so I'll have to pretend a bit, then school will start again from 8th makes me so sad and worriedddddd, school pressure for me is deadly, I have the best grades in the class but I still constantly feel like I'm always behind, like I have to rush and run for everything, like I'm risking everything, I just feel too much pressure and it's so stressful
I just wished I had different people in my life, but they're the only ones I have, I don't know many people and my social skills are probably close to a negative number, sometimes I just tend to close myself completely and even hide things from people I'm supposed to tell things to
Like idk if you remember that I told you that nobody besides a single friend (one of the closest ones but she lives in another country) gave me the wishes, she texted me a thing, that was basically the answer to a message I sent earlier, but the fact is that I didn't know how to keep going with the conversation, I just tought about many things to say because then I'm afraid because as soon as that specific conversation ends I don't know when will the next one be, I just constantly fear that others might forget me or suddenly change idea about me, that maybe they'd even be thinking I might be ignoring them on purpose and so on
This thing kept going until I realized I hadn't answered her for 2 days, I just sent a thank you and I feel so much bad for thatttt, I'm just so bad at handling friendships and so on and that makes me even more afraid of knowing people
Like when I get to know someone and it's nice my brain already thinks "hmm I guess what will happen that will ruin everything this time" and it just keeps happening
So yes I'm just so bad at relating with others, like actually when I'm with others, they don't think I'm like this because I pretend very well, but it's always so bad to keep everything inside and it's what pushed me to go here and take everything out with people like you
So yes, sorry for the huge rant but I just went from a tought, to another tought, and then I started overthinking about them and then all the rest, sorry, but it's 1am rn, it's like the overthink flow state time hahaha
But yeah I hope your sleeping well and that tomorrow morning you'll wake up well and happy
Sorry it was night here so I was sleeping!!that's why I m replying late
I remember!when u have to go out with people u don't really like and have to pretend it's not any fun!! I get u. Maybe it's because you are not comfortable with them that much that u just can't be yourself uk(oh u said that in the next line)..
Heey no u not not behind our brain just makes us believe we are and then makes us worried and after that we can't even do the minimum... And for a fact I can tell u you r not you will do it i believe in u !!.ik it's a lot of pressure school and everything... But u will do it!!
I also don't have social skills much tbh ! And it's hard to make friends tbh! But when u find people who r ur type ujust open up!! It's like u can feel it so there is nothing wrong with u... And uk how to keep a conversation uk.. se here u talk with people and can keep a conversation going !! So u cannn!! It's just that u thinkkk too muchh before talking to them (bcz u fear being judged or saying wrong think maybe )
You are not bad at handling friendship it's just that from a long time u never had a healthy friendship so that's why your mind is in constant fear uk!
Yeaah that's ur mind kinda protecting u so u dont get hurt it always thinks bout the worst possibility
I m so sorryy! Ik pretending is just so hard and all u want is to teel how u really are but u can't
But I would say one thing it's just because u haven't found the right people.. people with whom u can be ur true self! U aree so nicee as youuuu areeee !! And u deserve to beee loved how u areeee reallyyy!!
It's more than fine... I m glad u wrote this alll instead of keeping it in your mind
I hope for the sameeee ( I m gonna go to school then coaching so if i reply late )
Bye byeeee tc careeeeeeee 🤎
Yes don't worry!! I already knew it was night so really it's okayyy!
Thank you! The pressure is always more and more every year and it's very difficult to handle, I don't really know why I have it, materially, I can't seem to find something materially that is supposed to cause me that, it just does and I can't help, but thank you for your support!!!
Yeah it's true, once I find the nice people I open up quite easily, that's why I'm talking with you that I've known for like a week or somethingg!!!
I don't really know what I fear in others, I fear many things, judgment, betrayal, being treated badly and so on, all that kind of makes me want to have nobody around but at the same time I want people around me so muchhh!!!
Thank you so much you're so nice as welll!!!! Really you're amazing and you deserve all the love possible as welll!!!!!
I'm glad that you're okay and even happy with me opening to youuu! Remember that it's always the other way around as well! You can tell me anything that goes through your mind! Whether it's a serious thing, a lighter thing, or anything random, I'm here for you, reallyy!!!
Bye and take care as welll!!!! ❤️
Hi
Get well soonn buddy 🤎
I just wanted to tell u I may not be online for some days
Take careee bye byeee seee u
Loveeee u 🤍
Thank youuu
Ok okayyy, is there something wrong? We can talk about whatever it is really, I care so so so soooo much about you seriously, if anything goes wrong, text me, no matter whether I'm sick or not I'm always here for you and you'll always be a priority for meeeee 😭😭❤️
Love you so muchhhhh ❤️
Thank you so much for caring that muchhh reallyyyy😭😭😭 I have no wordsss🥹 but i dropped that ideaaa of leaving this site!
Buttt i realalyy love uuuuu whyyy are u sooo nicee i mean howww can a real person be so nice .. are u sure u are not ai ? 😭
You're welcomeeee!!!! I always will care this much and even moreeee seriouslyyyy, ohhhhh that is just awesomeeee!!! I would have cried if you didddd, thank god you dropped that ideaaaaa 😭😭😭 I'm so glad seriously I would have been so sadddd 😭😭 I'm so happy you did really 😭❤️🫂
I love you so much toooooooo!!! Like you're literally so awesome seriouslyyyy!!!! ❤️😭 I'm just as nice as you areeee!!! Like idk I just care about you very deeply, I love you a lot, and all that is because you're simply such an awesome and amazing person, I seriously mean it dearrr, nooooo I'm not ai hahahahaha, at least maybe you areeee ❤️❤️😭😭 I love you so much and I'll never say it enough timesss you're amazing ❤️🫂
Tysmmmm😭🤎sry u m tired but I wanted to reply 😭 so if my seems dry song mind 😭
Can I just something... I don't think so tbh I m not...I m not nice nothing...at first it seems like this but in reality I m not...I know u meaan it really but it's hard for me to believe 😭 ( you really r... I m not ai can't have low self esteem)...love u tooo😭🤎 ( sorry for thisss ignore thiss.. this is not meeee really lol)
Sorryyyyyy 😭😭😭 I remembered I had answered to this but I actually didn'ttt, I feel like my head is in the clouds for now that I'm sickkk
Ohhhhh thank youuu, it's okay you're always everything but dryyyy, like the dryest you is the nicest a normal person can beeee
Nooo dearrrr, you areeee niceeee, I don't know who the *** put this self depreciation in your head but trust me you are awesome, you're fantastic seriously, I will keep telling you until you'll finally realize that even by yourselffff, dear you are nice, you are so thoughtful and selfless, you're just amazing seriously, at first you are nice, and the more I know you, the most I realize you're just awesome!!!! Trust me you really are, I swear ❤️❤️ I have a very bad self esteem tooo, many dooo, but trust me, you deserve all those compliments and even moreee, it's okayyy, as I told you, you can tell me everything that goes into your mind, I'm glad you felt comfortable enough to tell me
And I love you so muchhhhh ❤️🫂 I love you because you ARE amazing, it's not an opinion, it's a fact, and I know it ❤️ love youu
Don't say for for this it's okayyy...ik that being sick sucks 😭
Thank youuu😭🤍
Thank youu so much really... Actually in night when I m really exhausted i type what I really feel so its like I can't pretend to be okay at late night 😭 and yeaahh I m comfortable with u !!! So i wrote everything here !... As u sooo niceeee.. you are helping me even when u are sickkk u r really niceee ukkk andd i really love u 😭🤍
Thankk you so muchhh😭🤍 loveeeeee u🫂
Thank you for your understandinggg!!
You're welcomeee!! ❤️
And I think that may be gooooddd!! Like you often tend not to talk much about how you feel and so onnn, but I want you to fell better so I hope to help youuuu, and you can absolutely be yourself seriously, it's okayyy, and I'm glad you're this comfortableeee!!! Oh thank youuuu, you're so nice toooo, and I will always always help youuu, whatever happenss, I will always help youuuu, you're wonderfullll and I really love youuuu, seriouslyyy!!! ❤️
You're welcomeee, and I thank you for how amazing you're to meeeee, I love you sooo muchhhhh ❤️😭🫂
U don't have to say thanku 😭
Thank you so muchhhh..😭 i meaan I don't want to be a burden for u 😭..buttttt I srsly love u thankkkuuuuuu so muchhh forr all thisssss idk how to express much I hopeeee u gett that 😭
It's reverseeee!!!🫂
Ohhhhh absolutely nottttt 😭😭😭 you're everything but a burden to meeeee 😭😭😭 having the possibility to talk with you is just amazing for youuuu, and instead I'm so happy tooooo 😭😭❤️ it seems to see me talking because that's what I always sayyyy
Thank youuuu!!! I love you reallyyyy, like I can't stop saying how much I truly love youuuu ❤️😭🫂 I absolutely get ittttt
Love youu!!!! ❤️
Alsoo could we please like, talk in real time tomorrow? I would want to show you something
Likee talk at sameee time ?! Yeaah sureeee I will be freee after 8 pm that means 4 30 for u I guesss !! After that we can talk!!
Oh that's greatttt!!! I have to go to the doctor at like 5, so 8:30 for youu but once I get back I can talk with you all the time we neeeddd!!
Okieeeee do tell me what the dr said and how are youuu ? Is u fever okayy nowww ?! Andd i maybe not onlineee sorry I m not well 😭
Yeahhh thank youuu, I'm still sick, but less, oh okayyy, don't worryyy, are you sick or there's something going onn??
Yuppp! Ohh 😕 that's guddd!! I m online for now!! No noo I m okayy! My eyesss 😭
Ohhh sorry I'm outside rnnn 😭😭 we can talk once I get back, I hope you'll be available by thennnn ❤️
Hehheh tysmmmm😭🫂....srslyy talking withhh is best time of my dayyyy!!!!
Hehhehh I loveeee u toooo 😭🫂
Ohhh reallyyyy 😭😭😭 it is for me toooo ❤️😭🫂
I love youuuu ❤️😭
Yessssss..really? 😭
🥹🫂
Hey just wanted to check in
Howw areee youu ?! How is ur feverrr ?!
Hey
Uk when u wrote someone paragraph about even simple detail about how was ur day or even a rant it means a lot uk... Or when u tell me i really matter i know they are just words butt i really feel that u mean it... I can see that in the way u text...it's means a lot... It feels like u are genuinely interested in talking
U knowww i was thinking about something and u were the first one that came on mind with whom I can share that...but I can't share that in formus so let it be... But I just wanted tooo sayy thank youuu I really love u 😭 and I mean it... I get attached to people really fast..but only a few people can make me emotional...or can make me feel like I matter to mee... Idk what i m even saying I just wanted to tell u... Thank youuu !
Soory if i said anything wrong and for my typos also😭
Beachhhhhhhhhhhh 😭😭😭
Btw thank you so much for taking to me today...u made my day a lot better 🤍🥹🫂
Hii dearrrr!! Good morninggg!!!
How are you today?? I hope everything is going welll!! ❤️🫂
Hey beachhh...uk i m exactly like u..I think i m wierd..and I have also spent most of my life wasting time and self blaming and thinking why i the way I m
And uk what it got me nowhere.. and ik sometimes u just can't be positive and it's really okay but I want to tell u doo what u like what makes u happy don't think about people.. uk people try to be close to people who love these and don't care what others think
And if u will do things that makes u happy u will be happy one dayy reallyy.. like happy from inside and u aree really so nice and i m not saying this for show i really means it...
Heyy beachhhh! How aree u nowww ?
Hii beachhh.. I really hope u are okay and i really want to tell u...u are one of the best person I met online... And uk people online know better.. like they know u deeply...like we share things that we can't tell someone in real life so online friendship matters and everyone loves u hereee
And i wanted to tell u I m going to take a break from this site sooo take careee I loveee u..
