Just because.
@FormalPsycho
Just in case you'd ever like to share anything. I might make a "Lego" record player to put next to the piano.
How's it been with your ex?
John, I had this dream where I was on a date with someone I met only a few weeks ago, and then I had another dream where we were to be engaged. We were looking for rings but I saw a pair of earrings and was like, that's what it needs to look like.
So it's something like this: https://ibb.co/zhKnytDH
Tell me your thoughts.
@FormalPsycho Hey, John! Are you doing alright?
Dating Kylie.
@FormalPsycho for revenge or love?
@FormalPsycho Also can you give me your opinion on these rings, they are the same color scheme from my dream.
@FormalPsycho How's it going with Kylie?
https://drive.google.com/file/d/1v-IWmUEpoFAUhwjkGXIjcSy1wYgJ8tN_/view?usp=drivesdk
This is the most finalized version of Pearl Cliffs.
@FormalPsycho Thank you, John. May I ask, I understand Abby, and Kylie being Harvey, Mary being Kylie's friend, but who inspired Reagan and Ms. Pauline?
My aunt is Reagan, and there are a few old people at this church I went to who contributed to Ms. Pauline.
@FormalPsycho Bad experience with religion?
Not the religion itself, the people.
@FormalPsycho I understand. You see for me for example, being a Jehovah's Witness is perfectly logical. The issue is that sometimes the people are imperfect and stray from what's supposed to be done. They hurt you. I don't let it stop me from practicing my religion though. I met people who truly do what we are meant to. They help me feel very happy.
@FormalPsycho How are you feeling Jonathan? 💜
I feel fine.
@peacefulpurple08
Hey John! You're a year older now aren't you, either that or soon to be. How are things with Kylie? Heard Chicago "25 or 6 to 4" & thought of you. Thanks again, for the musical knowledge.
Yes I am, strange I've been on this side for a year now.
Kylie and me ended shortly after our last interaction. It's quite fine, I've been able to move on from everyone. I'm in a very healthy relationship now.
Really I have no need to be here, but what's another year.
Life's been normal and slow. And you?
@FormalPsycho
Life has gotten better, that guy I used to like, don't like him anymore. I don't go to the same "church" (we call it meeting but that's the equivalent for you) anymore either.
I love the one I go to now, everyone there is both genuine and kind, you can't even tell what position the they hold unless you ask someone. They're not boastful and they look out for each other. We look out for each other.
Made a new friend, her brother had caught my eye, because he physically looks like young Paul McCartney but green eyed. Anyhow, thought I might develop a crush on him, thankfully not. There was this guy I had a slight crush on but he's studying the Bible at this specific school we have for 8 weeks, less now. So, romantically and emotionally speaking I'm finally not crying each five seconds.
@FormalPsycho
There's this kid I know from an old congregation I was in when I was younger, but I don't really like him crush wise. Loves God, cute, nice, but somethings missing. When he speaks he uses too many filler words, actually "umm/uhh" is a pet peeve of mine, and when answering Bible related questions he says it every other word. I won't judge him for that, but whether I could marry and live with someone who speaks like him, I don't know.
It's just that when you love someone you are supposed to overlook it more seamlessly. I have to actively remind myself that he's actually a great guy when he speaks. I do consider him though, because I know what kinds of questions he raises his hand for, so I don't prepare for that one on purpose. Usually the last of an article or a personal one.
@FormalPsycho Something I wanted to say but forgot, I'm happy you're in a healthy relationship you a) deserve it and b) need it after everything you've been through romantically speaking. Also, your significant other has you asking people about their lives and everything. XD
Thank you for asking, John!
@peacefulpurple08
How is everyone teen side? any news from Chuck? 2 days ago was my 2 year cupversary or however you spell it. I've become rather docile. You'd be strangely proud of me I'm sure. I'm also not much of a writer anymore, that seemed to disappear with the insanity.
@FormalPsycho most of them have left by now. Either aged up or decided not to stay.
No news from Chuck, I miss her, and hope she's safe.
I'm older than you cups wise then. XD mine was in January.
It's alright to not be a writer anymore. As long as you feel comfortable. I'm sure I would be proud.
@FormalPsycho most writers are a little on the edge to be fair. I mean the guy that wrote Alice in Wonderland had to be a little eccentric for sure.
@peacefulpurple08
It's strange to be the few remaining. There will always be more, I was trying to remember those on that side, Amy and Chuck are the only people I remember off hand.
@FormalPsycho you've never had to remember me because I'm too annoying to forget. 🤣
@FormalPsycho to be fair you didn't like most of them.
I suppose, doesn't mean they aren't preferred to the people here. You'll see when you arrive.
@FormalPsycho dreamt with you, which means it's time to ask: how are you doing? :)
Confusing.
abby texted me.
"Skyler, I know I'm the last person you'd expect to hear from again. I just wanted to say that I hope you're doing well. I am working at a hospital like I've always wanted. I am even going through the process of signing up for a Surgery technician class. I just was thinking about all the harm I've caused you and the pain. I cant escape the guilt i have for what i did to you. So with a heavy heart i must let you know how sorry I am. I hope you've moved on to bigger and better things like you deserve."
"Thats all."
I haven't responded, its been a week since she texted, I only read the message four days ago.
I don't know what to do, I've told my partner abby texted and sent the screen shot. She said to not text, she doesn't need to receive anything from me. So that's what I've done.
I'd like your opinion as well, you always have a good perspective I can't see.
In my mixed feelings I forgot to blur my other halfs' name. Please do not call me by that name.
@FormalPsycho John, if the name at the beginning of Abby's message is the one you mean, I'd never call you that. No offense, but it feels nothing like you. In the most non judgemental way I can say this, it sounds like someone chewing bubble gum while riding a glittery skateboard but the skateboard is aqua. Now there's nothing wrong with that it just doesn't fit the you I know.
Now for the advice part, your partner is right. You have severe lack of self control when it comes to Abby. Not to mention she doesn't even matter right now, because you already have a girlfriend. Abby had the chance to be yours, well really multiple chances and took none. Not to mention how nice you were and how she took advantage of you. I know you had feelings for her but she's not a good person John. You can forgive her in your heart, in order to not have it weighing on you, but don't give her the pleasure of knowing you have. She does not deserve it.
P.s. it's something about how she didn't give back your extravagant gift. Any good person would realize, "Hey it's wrong to accept this, if I don't like him." Also in the future, you don't gift the girl you like money. You make sure she likes you too and you take her on dates. You could have gone to a couple different restaurants and taken her on 10-20 dates, with what you gifted Abby.
Thank you for your honesty and words. It is what I needed to read.
@FormalPsycho
I'm glad it helped. I really wish you both the best!
P.s don't forget to get them their fav snack every now and then. Almost everyone has a fav snack.
Her favorite snack is cheezits, it's a thing we have.
Ill wear cargo shorts with snacks, and she'll have her purse with snacks I enjoy, which is just an excuse to pack more snacks for herself.
Im sure you cant even begin to imagine me wearing them, I personally hate it, but we all make sacrifices.
@FormalPsycho
Cheezits are nice, but they remind me of my sister. It's a good memory, she's just not close to me anymore like during that time. I remember us laying in her bed, eating all the cheezits in the big bag, watching Disney Chanel, the show Jessie specifically the episode where Luke has to wear a knee brace and stay home from a carnival and they think their butler is a killer.
(You can skip the next bit if you'd like)
They think he's a killer because he followed an officer with a malet but the malet was from the test your strength game and the butler was just showing him how to win because he had always won prizes at every booth but the ring toss. So when he heard their nanny was hosting it he swapped the bottles and won for the first time while also accidentally sabotaging the carnival fundraiser. The thing is that the way he was sneaking around to do that looked exactly like a murder and the bottles looked like a body in a duffle bag. The nanny had wrongfully suspected that this other nanny who hates her had sabotaged her booth but it was her own coworker, the butler. Also there's actually 3 other kids besides luke, and one is biological the rest are adopted by rich parents who don't spend time with them but spend money on them. Not cold just not present enough.
(Continue here if skipping)
So that's honestly a great snack & it's super cute that you'd do that. I must find a guy willing to wear cargo pants to carry snacks. That's the new requirement on the list. XD a guy who'll carry snacks for me. I'm actually laughing so hard thinking of that. Imagine him saying no, and that's the deal breaker. Now it's at the top of my list. "Pockets must be full of chocolate and sour gummy worms at all times."
@FormalPsycho To be fair John, what's the point in looking like a gentleman if you don't get her her snacks. Plus you're already taken so it's alright to not look 100% all the time. I am in fact confused that you didn't choose cargo pants instead. More storage space and less leg showing. Also cargo pants probably work for you as a mechanic as well.
Hey, John! How's it going? @FormalPsycho
Its going great, couldn't be better.
And yourself?
@FormalPsycho
More or less the same actually. I feel like I fit in where I'm at and I have so many new friends. Me who had never played a basketball game before, was asked to join. I embarrassed myself but they didn't care, and the way they took care of me and tried taking it easy on me, was endearing.
Not to mention my mother and I baked a cake together and my crush had a piece. I know he likes me no one tries so hard to get your rogue basketball back to you, while still eating the cake. He put me over the dessert he liked. XD sounds crazy. Oh and as soon as I got there he complimented my shirt and started being well, super super nice.
I suppose he does, I wish you the best of luck. Life is still swell, nothing much to add I suppsoe.
@FormalPsycho I'm not even joking at this point, cake in hand, spoon in mouth, he ran to get my basketball back. Oh and there's this one good seat and he was sitting in it and he immediately got up and was like "seat's free!"
Not to mention his mother was complimenting a cute sweater I had, the buttons had embroidered purple flowers on it, "the sweater looks so cute, you look so pretty" and somehow "yeah!" slipped from his mouth.
Oh what about the time I asked him about his favorite color, he said blue and I said "oh I don't think I've ever seen you wear blue" and the next day he wore a navy blue suit.
Teenage romance, it's rich. I would say it is worth asking him out. My two cents, ask him out. He's too shy, I believe he is too shy to do so himself.
@FormalPsycho see that's the thing...he's not a teenager...oh also I graduated. Since I had said that he's actually been gone, he will be for two years, traveling to teach the Bible where it's needed.
I've realized that I get along quite well with most of my new friends fathers. We just randomly get good conversations and it's a nice feeling, because I've never really known what it's like to have one.
@peacefulpurple08
This one guy is just a few months younger than me (I thought he was older, I was wrong). Born in February, me in August.
Anyhow, his dad was talking to me about the future and then he said something about liking to make things. I asked what his favorite thing he's made was, he made that face and said "great question!". He showed me a beautiful orchid centerpiece made of a broken branch, a painting he copied freehand because he liked the artists work but it's milionaire kind of stuff. Two old cars that he fused together and it is functioning, and he told me of the time he and his kids took a whole car apart and went building it from scratch, engine and all, piece by piece.
@FormalPsycho
Hey John, how's it been?
I have been well, and yourself?
@FormalPsycho been good as well, thanks for asking. Hope your girlfriend has been doing well too. Keep those cheezits in your shorts. XD
I got invited by a kid's parents to watch the third place world cup match last Saturday. I've gotten close to Daniel's parents, his father especially since he's a good dad. Daniel cooked the meal, felt like he was trying to be impressive.
Very interesting, I'm keen on these developments.
An important topic I need to share.
Today is Letter Day, last year today I dropped off letters and roses at abbys house. She mad a post at 12:42, she has a new lover. It will last this time.
I wrote about it, I'll send it later. I admit, I'm jealous. It will be a harsh day for me, but I hope yours will be better.
@FormalPsycho hey remember she's not a good person, the person you are actively with is much better. You have no need to be jealous. You are the winner here.
Yes, yes you are right. The letter as promised.
You have forgotten the meaning of today. I will never ask of you to remember it again.
It's gut wrenching to see, should I be proud? You made it work 4,700 miles away.
Upon the verge of dawn.
Or was it planned? You're all too clever to tell.
Codes and keys can't protect me from the pangs of jealousy.
My own memories will distort, a terror of my own imagination.
I will retaliate, I will be jealous, but I will do so with care.
Right here in neurotica, so long.
July 22nd
@FormalPsycho it seems to express how you feel perfectly.
@FormalPsycho I would like to ask an additional question. I've realized that you get into relationships pretty quickly while recovering from her. Is there a reason why, does it make it easier? Genuine question.
Also, do your feelings of jealousy affect your current romantic partner?
My current feelings have not affected my current relationship, these jealous feelings have subsided.
As for the reason, is subconscious, therefore I believe I forget about her in those moments. I suppose there is a more deep rooted answer than this, but it's a scab I haven't yet picked at. I should leave it time to heal, I've calmed down since Wednesday. I wrote a second letter from that day.
Today was supposed to be a special day. I knew you wouldn't know what it was, but I never could've expected the coincidence.
To coincide with the failure of you and I, you had announced the launch of the next big phase.
I am skeptical of it, I will only want what's right for you, that which makes you suffer.
I would be thoughtful in a hateful way, retaliation in the gentlest of turns.
"I sound more harsh than I am," I would imagine not, I'm weaker in words than in thought.
Regardless, I cant make up my mind, you never cease to send my mind spiraling, this inner turmoil of mine.
July 22nd
@FormalPsycho I like the rhythm if this one.
@FormalPsycho *of (sorry autocorrect)
Well it's out of my mind now, how has life been? What of this boy that has happened since?
@FormalPsycho which? the one that left for two years? Gave up on that, because he has decided not to keep contact and that shows me how much he cares. If you mean Daniel, he's just a friend, too young. There's a new guy I met my age actually, I couldn't tell you how I feel about him, he is physically cute but I'm not sure yet.
@FormalPsycho This kid's name is Nathanael he's slightly childish but he's mature enough at the same time. He loves to "argue" over literally anything. It's just so funny, and I enjoy his company. Like him telling me Purple isn't a color Violet is like ROYGBIV, but then messing up and calling a necklace his little sister brought over purple. I know he at least enjoys my presence because he smiles when he sees me and I don't usually see him smiling quite the same with other people, only if they say something truly funny. Not a word would be said and he'd smile, and sadly his smile is super cute so I physically must smile back.
@FormalPsycho like idk why, we'll just look at each other zero words and start laughing. Which is a great start to a friendship. I was playing pickleball with him actually and it's pretty fun we weren't playing by rules we just hit the ball far and with force and ran to hit it back.
@FormalPsycho I wanted to let you know I'm actually moving to the adult side soon. 18 days or so.
How exciting, I would say your goodbyes the day before moving up day, I'm excited for you to meet the people here.
I am not sure what rules there are about informing you of the users on this side, I would enjoy telling you about the people I have met.
I've been on vacation for a while with my girlfriend, we are in the virgin islands with her family.
I will tell you all about when I get home, just heard the news and wanted to reply, I never mean to keep you on delivered, I'm excited to once again chat. You are considered a friend of mine.
@FormalPsycho
Happy to hear you consider me a friend, and enjoy your vacation together. Sounds like it's getting a little more serious with you two, if you're on vacation with her and her family. Happy for you! :D
Thank you, I am back in the states now. The biggest news is her cousin who sounds just like abby, I have since made peace with it. Anyhow, the biggest announcement is that I am now an airman.
@FormalPsycho wait like U.S Air Force?
Yes, that is correct.
@FormalPsycho Sounds like quite the change, I hope you're always safe. Personally I have no emotions toward it being a good/bad job, I just know I wouldn't take it because of my own beliefs.
@FormalPsycho yk there's been slight development with green eyes. He said "that's a nice shade of violet you're wearing" along with telling me I was trying to leave him and then asking me to come back. Later, he called me "twin" for the first time. So I'd say I'm definitely liked as a person. But romantically it's too soon to tell. His face was dirty from playing basketball because the ball gets dirty over time and I told him, so he wiped his face, but it made three lines and out of all things, I told him, "have you ever seen a tiger?" Then he made two lines under his eyes like a football player and we laughed.
@FormalPsycho
He is honestly super handsome, I don't want to show you a real photo over forums so this is like anime him, which preserves what he looks like without actually being him.
He's out of my league honestly, but he's the one who keeps coming back to talk, so yk. Take the glimmers where you can. If I told you somehow even sweaty dude looks good idk, it's just life ***.
@peacefulpurple08 I meant to say I guess but I forgot that it gets censored.
How interesting, "green eyes" I hope it works out, my opinion is that there is a slight interest, though it matters who makes the first move now.
To what I must admit, I've been referring to past letters to see what day I shall see you here. I may have said so before, but I never got to say my proper farewells. I was taken a few hours too soon. I hope the same does not happen to you.
@FormalPsycho There has been a development. Idk how he feels about me romantically because tbf this kind of card and knowing the way he is...it might not be at all, but I know he loves me as a person.
P.S Jehovah is just a name for God so you can fill it in and get the sense of what he's saying.
He said the sticker thing because I had made him a note and a card and put a sticker on both on separate occasions. I gifted him some chocolates and sour gummies, because I figured out he likes both when he started begging a boy his sister's age for his. XD
The purple being labeled is because we always fight over violet vs purple. I had asked him what he'd call a specific color in one note.
How cute, my own beliefs lead me to think he does take interest. Granted I am not a religious man so I can not see the reason behind any action be so deeply motivated from religion. Though however it may be, at least he is a friend.
@FormalPsycho
It's not something required, religion doesn't have to do with whether he writes such things but it does have to do with how he expresses himself. How do I explain, these compliments are to us the highest kinds you can receive. Those of which go higher than "you're a great person".
@FormalPsycho Honestly I'm just happy that my crush loves me as a person. I'm happy with that. This great good looking guy thinks I'm amazing and that's enough.
Could you say you are contempt? Will you ever want more? With myself I know the answer as I have beared witness to this. I am glad you are happy however.
@FormalPsycho I would like more but for the moment I am content.
More good news so we actually don't live far from each other and as Jehovah’s Witnesses we all teach the Bible and go door to door (not the point of the story) he's in my group, today we rode with him, his grandfather and his grandmother, him as the driver, to the territory, we did that, we then proceeded to take a break at Starbucks.
This man and his grandmother offered to buy me and my mother something, we rejected, we always do, we don't drink coffee and we were fine. He goes up to the counter and looks at me from there, his grandmother pulls my arm to the counter and makes him order me something. Me and him go back and forth until I settle for a small lemonade. Smallest size being 16oz...that's a whole other thing.
We proceed to all have conversations with each other and he sits next to me and we have a conversation. His coffee is mid spill (he took off the lid) and I tell him "careful" as it's falling. He thanks me, but I feel he was slightly sarcastic so I said "I just didn't want you to get it on you" because it was still super hot.
Later his grandmother goes to restroom my mom suggests I go as well, I say no then I say alright I will. He tells me "oh btw you need the code to enter" and me and my mom are both shy about that, so she tells me to ask, and I tell her. Guess what he got up and asked and told us.
As if I needed more reasons to love him.
@FormalPsycho
I forgot the most important part, he had opened the door when we came. I wanted to hold the door when we left but he held it from inside and started fighting me over it. He told me later that he even asked me to hold his coffee so I'd let go. But I just held it with my free hand while he was still holding it too. (I had just supposed he needed a napkin or smth since he's slightly clumsy with coffee)
Seems like every day is a better experience, would you say he could develop feelings?
@FormalPsycho ...It feels like he could but how do I put this delicately there's a beauty gap between us. I'm not as beautiful as he is handsome. Idk how he feels about that or if that will cause him to not go for it. Possibly.
We shall see.
How else have you been?
@FormalPsycho Pretty good started college today so nervous but also learning. Thanks for asking! You?
I have been doing okay, college was a shock to hear, what are your plans?
@FormalPsycho Nothing big, Associate in Science for Accounting Technology. Most of my family is in accounting. Dude my Principles of Finance class had maybe 2 other girls otherwise it was just like 30 guys.
@FormalPsycho True what they say about Finance being Male Populated (I refuse to say dominated, they do not have power over me XD)
Interesting. I have my ship out date, November 24th.
