@MusicCandy @SadMe70 New place to communicate
@MusicCandy Hi! I decided it was easier to just start a new thread. I can't figure out the old one.
I am headed to my mom's tomorrow until Sunday night. Today is the fifth anniversary of dad's death. I couldn't get up there today, so it's the first time I won't be with her on the actual day. I won't be on here this weekend, so I'm writing this on Wednesday.
Yesterday I made my first trip to the mountains in a long time. I hiked to Mary's Rock. It was not crowded and was great weather. It was kind of funny hiking in a t-shirt with snow on the ground!
Today we are celebrating my DIL's birthday. The actual day is Saturday but I'll be at mom's. I am going to make the Korean dessert that I made for New Year's, since their dog ate all the leftovers and she didn't get to try much of it. Then I have some cleaning to do, and some errands to run, and then pick her up 45 min away because my son is here at work near our house. I'm going early enough to drop by my other son's house first to meet his new dog. He and his fiancee are adopting a 2 year old. I need to do laundry to prepare for my trip, and need to write detailed instructions for my pet sitters. I have an old note to work from, but I have a new lady coming one day and I need to make it extra-detailed for her. She is a pet sitting company, so it will cost me, but I need another person in my rotation of feeders. So it's a busy day today!
I am grateful for my spring break this week that allows me to do all these things. I spent the weekend doing very little because I knew the rest of the week would be very busy! I don't like getting home the evening before I have to go back to work, since I won't get laundry, shopping, or cooking done, but it couldn't be helped!
I hope the new thread works out, and that I tagged you correctly so you will see it!
I hope your week has gone well, and here's to five more years of messages to come!
O my dear dear friend- you are going through too much. If only there was anything at all I could do to help. My life has been OK last week. Everyone had a nice time at Massanutten, church was fine, the pool is back open for Rachael to splash around- Fiance is about the same- some days better than others, but... You! Like you needed one more thing than to have to deal with neck pain and getting your car fix, insurance and all that involves. I do hope you get releif from your neck pain. I get that you don't want to go to the Urgent Care- they would probably want xrays, CT's and so on and you already know you have a past issue. The only thing to remember is that if there is something more serious, and the accident isn't your fault- the other driver needs to be responsible for your treatment and waiting longer could complicate his or her insurance covering it. Don't wait too long if you are still in pain. Still, I'm so sorry.
I hope your husband continues to get better too- good grief. I don't have anything very exciting coming up. Thanksgiving is the following week and we will have the church dinner like last year with anyone coming who wants to. One of the ladies in my prayer group that actually gets on my nerves complained that she didn't like the way I set the tables and chairs last year and could I do it the way she wants it this year? Tempted to say she could do it if she wants to. The thing I find interesting is that is it weighed on her mind from a year ago and she just HAD to mention it. For real.
Anyway, please know I pray for you and I will light a candle tomorrow for your healing. Till next time and I hope things are better soon.
Longer message, next page
Hello my friend. I did go to urgent care. They felt it was all muscular pain and didn’t do any other tests or scans. They prescribed a muscle relaxant, and I did already have the prescription strength naproxen left over from my knee. On Thursday I had my regular monthly dry needling appointment so I had her do my neck and some shoulder muscles. Overall, my neck doesn’t feel too bad.
My husband was able to get the big flapping piece of trim off the back of my car, so now it is drivable. The insurance company of the woman who caused the accident has not been able to talk with her yet because she is still in jail, having been arrested at the scene of the accident. They refuse to proceed without talking to her, and apparently there is no time limit for them to delay as long as they want to. So meanwhile, we will take my car on December 1 to a body shop for an estimate, pay our $500 deductible, and my insurance company will pay to fix the car. Whenever things get resolved with the other company, supposedly I will get my deductible back.
I am leaving this morning to visit my mom until Tuesday. I’m looking very much forward to this visit, and hoped it would help me not think about my problems for a while. But of course, I can’t get through a week without another catastrophe, so last night, while I was eating popcorn, the whole inner edge of one of my molars broke off. I’m not even sure if it’s a tooth or a crown. The top surface in the middle is still covered so I’m not feeling any nerve pain, but I am terrified it will break the rest of the way off and I will have to find emergency dental service near my mom. Plus, of course everything will be closed Thursday and probably Friday. I cried when I went to bed last night, and I just don’t have anything cheerful to say today.
I’m so glad to hear your girls had a good time at Massanutten, and that your pool is fixed! I hope your fiancé will continue to improve. My husband has been doing well.
Wow, that lady that held onto her issue about something so simple as a table setting for an entire year, really needs something more in her life to do! It’s so frustrating that someone who is volunteering and doing something good for other people has to put up with such petty people. I used to be more active with various types of groups, and I just don’t do anything like that anymore partly because I can’t take other people, especially people like that! I’m sure your efforts are greatly appreciated by many other people!
Thank you so much for your prayers. I really need them right now.
I realized the tooth is a crown that I just got put on in March. The temp broke twice and now the crown has broken nine months after getting it. Grrrrrr
@SadMe70
It sounds like you do need some Mama time right now. The accident situation just shouldn't be that complicated in my opinion. What if you didn't have the 500 and no car! Its not your fault and I absolutely hate that you are going through all that along with your husbands' issues, your pain and now a broken crown- gee whiz- you just cant catch a break. They should redo that crown for free.
I'm not feeling as bad as you but I'm just in the doldrums. No time to get away from the grind. I'm not excited at all about setting up for the Thanksgiving dinner and usually I am. I'd just as well skip the whole thing and sleep. A member who I helped last year has called me and I know he wants a ride to the dinner like me and fiance did last year, but he does drive to other things so I'm not returning the call. He can always call the church; I'm about over it. I'll see how many signed up to come on Sunday and hope I don't run into the complaining friend. She is actually very busy with a lot of things but it has to go her way or she has to comment. I don't get with her unless I have to. I agreed to work some extra shifts in December since they offered a few extra dollars incentive pay, just to help me make another house payment. I plan to take it easier after the end of the year. Rachael is doing great though, and Fiance is funnily enough having more energy to get up since he noticed I was taking some of the stuff out of the basement! I need to attack another spot now and keep it on the lowdown. Still, I'm grateful he is moving more so I don't worry that he may have more stroke residual damage. I really hope and PRAY that you will have some relief and relaxing time with your Mom and a good Thanksgiving . Not cheerful either ,don;t feel like the lone ranger my friend.
Hello my friend, well I've had a better few days this week. The visit to my mom was wonderful, as always. On Wednesday I went to the dentist and got a new temporary crown. The dentist says the problem was insufficient clearance, that there should have been at least 2mm and was barely 1mm (though did not offer apologies that one of their dentists did it), so it was taking on too much pressure from my clenching and grinding. He also noted that he's never seen anyone break one of that brand of crown before (yay me) but there was a warranty so I will not pay for repair, just have to suffer through the extreme anxiety (I hate dental stuff!). I go back in two and a half weeks for the new crown.
I spent all day Thursday cooking traditional stuff for Friday's dinner, and enjoyed that. My husband had cooked the turkey on Wed night. Friday morning we went to my son's. We had snacks for lunch, played some games, and had our Thanksgiving dinner stuff for dinner. A friend of his came over, with his family. They have a three month old baby. They put her directly from the carseat into my arms, she fell asleep against my chest, and I held her for an hour. It was lovely!!
We will drop off my car at the body shop Monday morning to get the estimate for repair, and go from there. The other lady's insurance is dragging their heels, refusing to take responsibility until they talk to her, and they can't talk to her because she is in jail. I think there must have been a warrant out for her for something else, because even though she was charged with reckless driving, I don't think she would still be in jail for that alone. My husband googled a bit and did find two drug arrests last year.
After my good family time this week, I am feeling better in spirit. Crossing my fingers for no more mishaps for a while! Thank you so much for being there with your moral support!!
How are you feeling this week? Did you get through the Thanksgiving dinner ok? Were you able to get some rest, and recharge yourself at all? I'm with you on not calling back the guy who wanted to mooch a ride when he can drive himself to other things! Enough is enough on your very full plate!
Too funny that your fiance suddenly had more energy when he realized you were taking stuff out of the basement! Mine would yell and I don't want to deal with it, so that mess just sits there, to be dealt with "someday." My hope this weekend is to get him to at least clean up the living room, so I can bring in the two foot potted evergreen that I've bought to be my Christmas tree this year. Though as I'm feeling very lazy today myself, I don't know that I can get him motivated either.
I hate a big late lunch of Thanksgiving dinner leftovers, and am feeling very sluggish right now, so I may go lie down on the sofa for a while. That feels appallingly lazy, but I might do it anyway!!
I hope you have had a good week, and another good one coming up!
@SadMe70,
Hey lazy bones(just kidding) I hope you do take that nap. Your body must need it so just do it. I'm back at work but so far not too busy. The dinner at church went well, I had it all done ahead of time so even I was relaxed with the guests. No show on the phone caller and one other person who said they would come ( and is especially difficult) did not. But one lady who goes to the other service just showed up but didn't sign up. My personal quirk came out and I had a panic moment and when she said she brought sweet potatoes, I blurted out " I brought sweet potatoes", so rude and I tried to quickly repair the blunt remark with " we can always have more!" Since the one person that I thought might come but didn't, I had a place setting for her. I had planned the tables and chairs arranged just so everyone could see everyone to make the snippy friend happy and sure enough she tried to dominate the conversation, but I kept initiating convo with the lady I didn't know. So it was fine anyway. I sent everyone home and cleaned up , done in 2 hours. Just tired, but I brought it on myself!
I'm glad you are feeling better and that the tooth will be fixed and I know, I hate dental work too. Sounds like you enjoyed Thanksgiving and holding a sleeping baby is the best. Abi says they are going for the baby making lab procedure in January. Fingers crossed. By the time that happens 9 months later, I'll be retired so the timing will work out for me to spend time with them.
Fiance is doing some more leaf work outside along with moving things around in the basement. More normal for him on most days. That won't stop me. He is basically living off my paying for everything, and he could not manage without me-- he never yells, but he will start an argument, and I just try to not keep it going. There's so much anyway. I got all the Christmas stuff down from the attic and at least half of it is going to the thrift store. Like I said before, its mostly a patience game for me until he gets his Social Security and my house is paid off at about the same time. I'll pay for the junk to be removed if it comes to that, with HIS money.
When does your Winter break start? I'm working through the Holidays but its for my goal and the girls will be with their Dad. Stay warm and cozy and enjoy your Sunday chai. till next time , my friend.
Hello my friend, only one minor catastrophe this week - my temp crown broke. I’m mad that I had to take yet another half day off work because of their incompetence. I have little faith that the new one will last until the 16th when I’m supposed to get the permanent one. The news about my car from the body shop this week was not good, but I am not thinking about that until we hear from the insurance company.
Otherwise the week was pretty good. We actually went to dinner last night with the lady that I was going to the beach with a couple of Friday nights back in the fall. She taught my younger son and is someone I actually feel comfortable talking with. I don’t have to censor myself too much or act fake or try to fit in. I feel for you and your sweet potatoes comment. One of my problems in most social situations is saying the wrong thing. Either I panic or my brain comes up with something that I cringe about later, and then I wonder what is wrong with me that my brain thought that was the right thing to say. I’m glad the dinner went well and you survived the snippy, controlling lady!
I’m so excited for you that you might be a grandmother next year!! We had a long video call with my son last night, about two and a half hours, since his wife was not there. My grandson is in a phase where he clings to her and rejects my son, so he was having a screaming tantrum for about 45 minutes of the call. My granddaughter is out of diapers now, even at night! Apparently that happened two months ago but he remembered to tell us last night while he was dressing her to go outside.
I’m hoping over Christmas break to get my bedroom, walk-in closet, and smaller closet, packed up and go pick out paint and flooring. It is kind of cluttered in there too, but the main problem for me is where to put all of it. I really need to get that carpet out of there though. I think it’s causing me a lot of allergy problems.My break starts December 22 for two weeks plus the following Monday after that, because that one is a teacher workday. We will spend Christmas day with my son here, then I will go up to my mom‘s from December 31 to January 4.
I hope you make enough working over the holidays to take a nice step towards paying off your house! And just think, next Christmas, you’ll be retired and hopefully cuddling a new baby!
I’m typing this while drinking my chai, so it’s been a nice relaxing morning. I hope yours was as well!
@SadMe7test
@MusicCandy
My whole message would not post, so I printed it and now I'm going to type it again. Grr
Dear one, you made me smile with the future of Not working after maybe 5 more months, and they better get on with the January deal for a baby by Christmas. I cant even imagine what that will be like, and Rachael!! She adores babies. The therapists that come to Day Support are trying different things to help her communicate. We both found a GoTalk watch and I ordered one even though they can request Medicaid to pay for one too. I just saw it and they did too at about the same time. I had my fingers crossed and she put it on and kept pushing the buttons happily and excited. It records what you want and iI put on her name, how are you and I have three kitties. Individual buttons. They also ordered a weighted bracelet that may help her tremors, especially eating with utensils.
I signed up for extra shifts in December and now another church member has dies so a funeral reception next Thursday. The bossy lady volunteered to set up and decorate-the one who goes overboard.I messaged her that I'll help if I'm not working the day she wants to do it. I can also help serve and clean up since its a weekday and I'm not working Thursday. Wednesday, Fiance and I take the gifts to the shelter, and his truck will be full. The members did pick up all the names so that was good.
I know your heart must be full after having a long video with your son and the babies. I hope your overhaul can get started and you don't do too much with your knee. You need to rest during break from work. I got down boxes of Christmas stuff and sent half of it to the Thrift store. I did put up a small tree for Rachael but still have to decorate it. We have a huge tree in the attic and boxes of very fancy antique ornaments that Fiance salvaged from the "too good to throw away" section of the dump. When my Mom was here, we put that up and she helped decorate it. It is stunning, but too much for right now. It was a nice time with my Mom, so I have a pleasant memory besides all the troublesome ones. Have a happy Sunday, posting again now.
Hello my friend, not a bad week this week. I can’t remember if I told you, but my insurance company has decided to total my car. My policy does not include replacement cost, only market value cost, and of course they are trying to lowball us on that. One of the six comparison cars that they were using, I found on Carfax, was in a wreck and had major damage, and was not actually from Virginia, but was from Pennsylvania, where it would’ve encountered heavily salted roads all winter. So, we are continuing to fight with them. Sigh. Luckily we have the second pick up truck which I have been driving. It’s in pretty good shape despite being a 2008. It does get terrible gas mileage, though. I’m grateful that we had it though,because the body shop said my car was not safe to drive (after I drove it to my mom’s house!).
The week was good otherwise. My temp crown is holding up and the permanent one should come Tuesday. No other catastrophes! School went well, and I’m not feeling too bad despite the struggles of the last couple of months. I have been exercising well in the mornings and my yoga class. Not much chance to walk now that it’s getting dark so early.
We had another long video call with my son last night. He said that after my daughter-in-law came back from being in this country for the visit this summer, she actually started going to counseling sessions with him. I’m so happy to hear that, and hope that she does make some changes. I think there are changes that she will not be capable to make without the help of medicine for her hormonal and probable mental health issues, but it’s a start.The kids continue to cling more to her and to my son, but I guess that is natural when the mother is home all day. They are going to start preschool in March, so that will broaden their horizons and maybe even out how they feel about my son.
How is the go talk watch working out for Rachael now that she’s had it for a little while? How is the weighted bracelet doing?How lovely that she loves babies! She will be a wonderful aunt! Fingers crossed and prayers for you all that a baby does become a reality next year.
The little potted Evergreen that I bought at Walmart weeks ago to be my Christmas tree is still sitting outside. Not sure when or if I’ll even get it into the house, and I’ve done no other decorating yet, but I’m OK with that so far. Maybe once I’m off work I will get it up for a week or two.
I’m so glad you have a good memories of decorating with your mom!Did you decide to get that tree down this year?
that’s it from this end. I hope your week has gone well!
@SadMe70
Trying again. I did print what I wrote, so bope this one goes through.
I'm relieved that at least some of your acute stresses are resolving gradually. The dentist is never our fun place, so I hope the replacement goes OK, at least that's not the worst part. The car does sound like more of a dragging out hassle. I hate that you are the one having to go through it and it wasnt your fault. Have you gotten therapy for pain that should be covered by the auto insurance? It is so much to handle.
I am glad that you had another video call with your son. Is preschool free in S. Korea? When that happens, they will get used to a variety of people and that may help give Dad his time too. The counseling is a good start, you are right- but I'm sure you can see that it would be so much better all around with medication to support the therapy. I hope things stay steady for the holidays anyway- that can be stressful with all the joy and still- chaos.
Rachael loves her watch. It was loose on her arm, but Fiancé punch another hole and it fits pretty well now. The bracelet hasnt come in yet. But we did try headphones and she didn't balk at all with them over her ears. I played her fav Christmas music over my phone and she got so excited. They did that at Day Support too and she colored a Christmas card listening to the music. So happy to see her happy.
For me, I'm glad the funeral and reception is over. The over-the top lady did her usual- 3 times the food we needed and all her fancy cloths and china which a number of people had to stay and help her clean up. ( she didn't want me to stay which was fine) I was tires by then with all I have going on and helping serve. Members brought adequate food, but she. had to go to Trader Joes and get 75 dollars more(I saw the receipt) . Its like she has to prove we never can do it like she wants.
O well, I'm working tonight so I had time. Hope your week goes easy and joyfull.
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I printed it and I'll try to get back and p\retype and post - I don't know why it wont let you save anyway.
Hello my friend, I’m sorry you keep getting errors when posting! Thank you for sticking with it because it means a lot to hear from you each week
I have my new crown, and fingers crossed this one will last. The car thing is still dragging on. We’re now looking into what it would cost to purchase the car back from them, and we’re going to get estimates from two additional body shops. We went to the one that’s in their network, so I feel like they may have padded it for some reason.Also, I think some of the things that are cracked wouldn’t have to be repairedat all if we try to get it fixed ourselves. We just need to fix what will make the car safe.
I’m done with school until January 6! I just left CVS from getting my Covid and flu shots. The Covid makes me deathly ill for about 24 hours starting the next day, so tomorrow afternoon through Monday is not going to be fun! I’m getting a pelvic ultrasound on Wednesday morning because of my continued frequent light bleeding or spotting since I started the hormone patch. It is most likely from the estrogen, but I had a medicine check this week, and the gynecologist just wants to be sure.I have actually felt a little better for the past month, so I do want to stay on it.
I got dry needling done to my neck within the first week after the accident, and that’s actually helped a lot. I turned in my receipts for the medical claim to the car insurance just yesterday. They said they would pay for additional dry needling, so I might try to get one while I’m on break. My next regular one for my jaw is scheduled at the end of January.
Last weekend, I made a big batch of chili and froze two containers to give to my son and daughter-in-law for Christmas. Today I’m getting stuff to make split pea soup to do the same thing. Their main.gift was something we ordered online, and I really want to have something to hand to them on Christmas Day.
Preschool is not free in Korea. They are debating between two schools that have a different focus.One has an athletic focus, and has a pool so it includes swimming lessons. The other one is more academic.All sounds more complicated than when my kids were little!
I’m so glad that Rachaellikes thewatch and headphones! Playing Christmas music was a great idea. I’ve been enjoying a lot of that on the radio myself.
Your lady at church sounds so annoying! When I was more involved in community things, there was always someone like that. It’s one reason I don’t do any of that sort of thing anymore. People just annoy me.
Will you spend Christmas day with Abby? I will be seeing my older son on Christmas Day, and maybe we’ll get to do a video call with my other son. I hope you have a wonderful and merry Christmas, my friend!
@SadMe70
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@SadMe70
Its nice to hear from you too, and especially that at least some of the stress is getting better. I hope the US shows that you can stay on the hormone if it makes you feel better. I still take a small dose progesterone, and I think it makes me feel better too, just 12 days on then off. The crown is one thing out of the way, which is a relief, I'm sure. Also great that the car insurance will pay for the dry needling which is a good pain reliever for you. Better than one more drug certainly. Sometimes they don't cover alternative medicine, so I'm glad it went through- use all you can!
This whole Holiday season has just crept up on me. The Bishop visit is tomorrow at church and that was a big deal for some folks- I didn't grow up Episcopalian so not so much for me, just another Sunday. But then it's Christmas, I don't know how it came so soon. I did get all my gifts to sisters mailed and most of my cards- a few left to mail. However, there are 12 days of Christmas so I'm not really late. My piano students really enjoyed learning their piano pieces for Christmas and those lessons are also done until after New Year. School break for them, and you which I know you need.
I'm working through pretty much the whole next 2 weeks, but Abi did invite me and Fiance to a candlelight concert like she did last year on Thursday so that will be about it for me. Rachael will spend the day with Abi, Mark and their Dad. Its my last year with this crazy work ,so one more shift or two gets me closer to being done with the mortgage. I'm good at powering through to a goal. Christmas is not my favorite Holiday anyway. But I hope you enjoy your day with your son and that you get a happy call with your other son and the toddlers.
2026, here we come!
