Actual Abandonment
I have been desperately seeking professional help for a long time. I have BPD really bad and for some reason it has been getting worse lately with splitting and triggers and lashing out, then apologizing and collapsing into shame and self and self harm.
Yesterday I had my best friend and his family who were like my 2nd family that was actually loving, tell me they "need to take a step back" and hope that I get better and that the help I get helps me.
I feel as though the rug, or entire floor, has just been ripped out from under me.
How in the world do I go on trying to find the desire to keep going on the road to healing knowing it's going to take a very long time to get better, or even learn HOW with this much shame and guilt and self hate? This disorder, what is wrong with me, is not even my fault...😭
@nathandoesvoices
I'm so incredibly sorry for what you have to go through. Please don't blame yourself for your disorder. You're right, it's not your fault.
I really understand what it's like to not have someone to rely on. I rely on my mom a lot for support but she's in the hospital right now.
Please know though that you are supported by everyone here on 7 cups! I love you, we love you, you are not alone! 🤍🤍🤍
And I understand how hard it can be when you're still struggling heavily and in the brunt of something but feel like you have to recover or help yourself immediately.
You are amazing and special, as is everyone. We love you!
Hi.
I hope you are doing ok.
I have bpd too. If you need anything I'm here.
If we are being forced to suffer we can suffer together and help eachother if you wish 💜
