I may have bpd
I am young (younger than 16) and can't be diagnosed with bpd, but I'm almost certain I have it. Yes, I understand that people will say that it's due to my age and hormones or whatever but things have been happening for over a year now that all point to it.
Always bored and I feel like something's missing, self harm that has been escalating and getting deeper and deeper (my body is ruined), unnecessary anger that leads to self destruction and violent thoughts towards others, "spacing out" as I like to call it (I feel like there's glass walls around me, I'm not really there or I am dead) especially when stressed, drinking and smoking that hasn't stopped no matter how many times I get caught or how sad it makes my family feel, I have a general lack of empathy and always have (my parents say I have "sociopathic tendencies"), started sexually experimenting at a young age, among other stuff
I was born 2 months early, the doctors said I was for sure going to be mentally retarded and would need speech and social interaction classes, but here I am, smarter than all the other people around me, my therapist says that "my IQ is clearly higher than average", my parents think I am autistic
I was molested and moved around a lot, separated from parents when I was born due to medical issues (but that was fixed), was broke a lot and there's a history of mental illness (anger issues, anxiety, depression, suicide) in my family. Some drug use in the family, I think my grandma has BPD, she's been in and out of prison and she is impulsive and a druggie, parents divorced.
Opinions?
Ps- currently diagnosed with major depression, generalized anxiety, was almost diagnosed with binge eating disorder. Meds-(edited by Forum Mentor BurningEmber for mentioning specific drug names and dosages )
Hello vfifii. I hear that the issues that you are experiencing have some crossover between BPD and things that are generally attributed to "normal" teenage behaviour. I wonder as mental health issues continue to be discussed in open, supportive and informed ways whether more of these "normal" behaviours will be recognised as mental health issues.
Reading your post and scanning your feed, I have to say that you are displaying an enormous amount of strength and courage in the way you are approaching your mental health. I applaud you. Well done. Thank you for sharing your journey here. It is incredibly reassuring to read about somebody else's triumphs and struggles.
One thing that I would like to suggest, is that whatever label or labels you may have over your conditions, the coping strategies are largely going to be the same. There may be specific help too, but if you can manage your overall self the best you can, it will be easier to see the stuff that you are struggling with. It probably won't be an easy battle, but feel a great strength in you and a tender heart. You have every chance of success and every right to it.
All the best.
