New
I am currently new to this, but I have known I have had bpd for a while now. I can manage it a lot of the time and I am able to be successful in my career, maintain a normal house hold, and take care of myself, but that's about it. Personal relationships are very hard for me and I have been in one for the last 3 years. He deals with me very well but my behaviors are starting to take a toll on us. I had been researching DBT therapy for awhile and finally found a great place that offers group and individual in the course. I want to know has anyone found any success with DBT? I just started and there were people in my group where it had been there 2nd or third time. To me that is discouraging. All I want it to live a normal peaceful life. What prompted me to seek out a community where I can express my voice online was a fight that occurred earlier today. Everything was fine, but I woke up feeling alone and anxious for no reason. All I wanted was to be comforted by my boyfriend but he went about his day as normal. I didn't say anything to him that I needed to be hugged and shown some attention since I was feeling down. Instead I kept it in, which then made me angry that he still had not shown me any attention and I lashed out. It's hard for me to go to him to feel loved when I need it. When I want to give it I have no issues. Has anyone experienced this and if so do you have any helpful insights? Sometimes it's hard for me to distinguish between my emotions and my bpd emotions.
@Pumpkincandles
Pumpkin, I'm so glad to see that you have been researching DBT therapy. It is very, very beneficial for folks who are living with borderline personality disorder and I can see from your post ways that implementing the skills taught in DBT could better your relationships and your life overall. For example, one of the skills that we teach in DBT therapy is interpersonal effectiveness - meaning how to ask for what you need in relationships in a way that gives you a pretty good chance of getting it. Perhaps when you want comfort or a hug from your boyfriend, you could work towards asking for it directly (taking the risk that he might say no, but allowing for the possibility that he might say yes).
While it can sound discouraging that people cycle through DBT groups/treatment multiple times, it's actually what I would consider a strength of the program. People return because they see the first time through that it works. It really IS effective. But like anything else, over time we might fall out of the patterns, habits, and skills that we learn in this treatment and need a refresher course to get back on track. It's as common as someone who is depressed taking an anti-depressant, starting to feel better, and then saying, "Gee, I don't need this medication anymore." They come off of the medicine and suddenly their depression resumes after one or two months.
While Borderline Personality Disorder doesn't necessarily have a "cure," its symptoms can be alleviated, and I hope you will access that program you've found. You might also find a therapist who specializes in DBT to supplement you with individual work and support. Best of luck, and holding you in mind.