I don't know what I am feeling!!!

Hello all,

I need some help.

I started with a new job 24th April as a graphic designer.

I consider this is my first actual job. Earlier I have done several internships. My previous job was as a social media head. So, in that sense I do have some experience working in a job setting.

The incident at hand:

I went on the 24th to office, and the first hour was kinda smooth. I was interacting with people, looking around. (I am an introvert with social anxiety which has just gotten worse in the last year).

After an hour, as more people started coming in, my anxiety grew. When all the members of my design team had come (just 4 more people), that's when my anxiety sky rocketed.

I was being told about the work and informally interacting with everyone. They kept asking me some pretty simple questions but every time I went numb and couldn't open my mouth to give answers.

As the day progressed, I started feeling more anxious, feeling claustrophobic, felt like running away. Felt a heavy weight on my chest throughout the day, felt immobalised, got dry mouth, lost my appetite, and felt a strong pressure in my head.

Even though the people in my office including my team lead, are chill, I felt so anxious and scared. I never felt like this in my previous companies.

The second day of office was luckily work from home. I thought that would put me at ease, but it was the same. I couldn't speak in team meetings. The third day was the same.

Now, whenever I think about anything related to that office, or just see their names pop-up in notifications I started getting anxious and just start crying.

I haven't felt like this in a long time. Yes, I have been anxious a lot of time before, but the severity this time is concerning.

I spoke to bf about this and he understands and empathizes with me, but he couldn't really understand the severity. My therapist is also on leave.

I just want to know if whatever I'm feeling is valid, or am I just overreacting.

I have a personality disorder which I have been able to handle pretty well for last few years, but obviously the recovery journey is always a rollercoaster ride.

Any help would be appreciated. Thanks X