Jumbled up, a poem

I cannot find the words I want to say

I know I have them all here

jumbled up in my mind

somewhere

anywhere

I've thought of them tons of times

I at least have the thought of saying it

at least I have the thought to stand by

but what's a thought if jumbled up in my mind?

When I try and speak them

it's like my throat is shut tight

the fear 

that I just might say the wrong things

the knowledge

that sometimes the wrong things can be right

they are also jumbled up in there

but 

I have the need to scream them all out

and the hope that things will be alright

and the belief that good things will come in time.

Somewhere

in my jumbled up mind

is the words

simply waiting for the right time

6/4/24