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A Father's Adult Attachment Style May Be Directly Related to Anxiety in Children

User Profile: comfortableNight4463
comfortableNight4463 August 2nd, 2022

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"A study published in the International Journal of Psychology earlier this year found that the adult attachment of fathers can influence the anxiety levels of their children into adolescence. This study indicated that paternal adult attachment avoidance increased adolescent anxiety.

Avoidant Attachment Can Trigger Anxiety


Another study published in Frontiers in Psychology in August 2021 found that paternal avoidance negatively predicts the attachments of their children, with harsh parenting from fathers having a more negative impact on their children when compared to the effects of maternal harsh parenting.

According to a study published in the American Journal of Men's Health in December 2021, the anger of fathers tends to be associated with anxious father-child attachment and the anxiety levels of their children.

Secure Attachment Must Be Nurtured


Behavioral health medical director at Community Health of South Florida Inc., psychiatrist Howard Pratt, DO, says, “The secure attachment style is the ideal and represents fathers who are in control of their emotions and able to recognize when things are bothering them."

With the anxious ambivalent type, Dr. Pratt notes how these people may alienate those close to them, as they tend to have a negative self-image.

Dr. Pratt highlights, "Those with the avoidant dismissive attachment style have negative views of people."

Finally, there is the fearful avoidant attachment style, whereby Dr. Pratt notes that people may have extreme fear about being rejected, almost as if it is inevitable, and a negative view of themselves as well as others.

With avoidant attachment, Dr. Pratt notes that fathers are more likely to ignore their child’s needs.

Dr. Pratt explains, "When you have an anxious father, they are more likely to overreact, and they can be more controlling and interfere with their children’s lives. This can lead to conflict, particularly in adolescence."

To reach the goal of being a secure father, Dr. Pratt notes how it is about being aware of your emotions and making sure that you are doing what is best for your child, which means taking care of your own mental health.

It is crucial to establish a relationship with stable attachment from early on, as Dr. Pratt notes that children need to understand that they are loved, even when being corrected.

Attachment Issues Can Impact Relationships


Glowiak explains that children of anxious (preoccupied) fathers may struggle not only connecting with their fathers but others, while children of fathers with avoidant attachments may grow up feeling unloved, with children of disorganized attached fathers may find themselves confused.

Children of securely attached fathers often grow up having secure attachments themselves, according to Glowiak. They also have more confidence in themselves, as Glowiak notes how that can impact relationships with others.

Glowiak highlights, "The parent-child bond is the first and most significant bond a person forms. When that is compromised, many other critical considerations for development follow." Feelings of anxiety, depression, resentment, anger, loneliness, etc. may surface, according to Glowiak.

If one is a father who struggles with attachment, Glowiak recommends seeking help from therapy to address the issue head-on. Glowiak explains, "Family therapy is especially useful for addressing this issue, though it is likely the father will benefit from individual gains made first in individual therapy. Like adults, children want to be loved."

Read the complete article available at Very Well Mind!

Reflection:

What is your father's attachment style? How has it impacted you?

*My father has an avoidant dismissive attachment style. He never really showed much emotion other than anger. This might be a contributing factor to me finding it hard to open up to people. Thankfully, I deal with anger very well mostly because I know how it feels to be at the receiving end of it and I never want anyone else to feel that way. I do struggle with anxiety as well but I'm not entirely sure I can pinpoint the cause to my father's attachment style*

#Anxiety #Father #Childhood #AttachmentStyle




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User Profile: papaJohn65
papaJohn65 August 2nd, 2022

Interesting, I hope my kids have a good attachment with me


1 reply
User Profile: comfortableNight4463
comfortableNight4463 OP August 3rd, 2022

@papaJohn65 I hope they do! Always remind them that you love and support them. Thanks for reading!

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User Profile: 2aphod8eeblebrox
2aphod8eeblebrox August 2nd, 2022

@comfortableNight4463 This would explain so much. Ditto to what you wrote about your experience, minus the anxiety. My sister has got all the anxiety, I wonder if it has to do with myself being the firstborn, maybe by the time she was born he was different.

1 reply
User Profile: comfortableNight4463
comfortableNight4463 OP August 3rd, 2022

@2aphod8eeblebrox I'm sorry you had to go through a similar experience. The thing about anxiety is that it's difficult to accurately pinpoint the root cause. I hope your sister is coping well. Take care! Thanks for reading.

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