Do You Have Trouble Letting Go?

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“If you think of all the troubles and mishaps a person experiences throughout their life, clearly, they’re able to let go of almost all of them. When there is no reason to hold on to something, it slips away and has no more direct or visible impact on our lives.” The “letting go” is something that Ph.D.Carey has been curious about so he started an investigation in his practice. “Whenever someone would tell me that they just couldn’t let go of X or Y, I asked them, “Do you want to let go of X or Y?”. He admits being nervous at first - It seemed such an obvious, even dumb, thing to ask. However, what happened next surprised him. Almost without exception, when he asked someone who said they can’t let go of something if they want to let go of it, they said “no” or “not really” or other words to that effect. Often they seemed just as surprised by their response as he did. Usually, they were able to say why they’re not ready to loosen their grasp just yet.

If you find that you’re having trouble letting go, it might help to explore the reasons for holding on. There is always a reason. It might not seem practical or rational to you, but in some way, it is still personally important and significant. Sometimes people can even be embarrassed about the reason, but it’s only by visiting it and examining it that a reason that was perhaps relevant and useful in the past can be updated. You’ll let go when you no longer need to hold on. In fact, we let go of the vast majority of life’s events and episodes without even realizing we have. Therefore, letting go is not the problem. You’re already a champion at letting go of the things that don’t matter. Becoming aware of something you’d like to let go of but haven’t yet, is a signal that, in some way, for some part of you, that particular something still matters. If you let your mind roam free in that place you’d rather not think of, the discoveries might surprise you. When you’re ready to let go, it will go. It will slip away so quietly you might not even immediately notice that it’s gone.”

Read the whole article at Psychology Today

#Letting-go #Memories #Healing

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