Psychology Today: How to Be Your True Self
"Who am I? Who am I really?
It’s the question we often ask ourselves and usually find difficult to answer with full and authentic honesty.
Carl Jung wrote extensively about the process of individuation, which, in short, is the layered process of finding your true, authentic self. Individuation occurs when you recognize and acknowledge your persona (the personality that you present to the world) and integrate it with the contents of your unconscious mind, including your shadow (the disowned and hidden part of you that exists in the background of your everyday life). By connecting to your inner voice—your authentic self—you become conscious and aware of your true vocation. This is the journey toward the person you are meant to be, your journey to wholeness.
But how do we get there? How can we work toward individuation so that we may live the lives we are destined to live and be the people we are meant to be?
Acknowledge the limitations that have been placed on you in your childhood.
Moving forward often requires looking back. Did you really enjoy those years of dance competitions or did you continue on only because they made your parents happy? What experiences did you miss out on earlier in life that you regret now? Take some time to sit with your unconscious, and listen to what you really think about your history and what you would have done differently with that awareness.
Immerse yourself in a multitude of experiences and remind yourself of the interests and hobbies of your youth.
It’s never too late to teach an old dog new tricks. Trying a variety of new things, even things you think you might not enjoy, allows you to discover inner talents and passions you may not have known existed when your parents or even your spouse was calling the shots.
Practice everyday mindfulness.
There is a reason so many people turn to yoga and meditation, and it is not just for the health benefits. These practices allow you to learn how to reach the unconscious in ways you may not otherwise be able to.
Write in a journal.
When you combine the inner work of journal writing with the goal of individuation, you connect to your unconscious with direction and purpose. This gives you the opportunity to unlock your unconscious from within and pour out into your writing.
Seek counseling.
As an adult, it is often difficult to ask yourself the questions that need to be asked and to face the hard truths you must face on your own. Professional counseling can help you catch a glimpse of your inner self and discover the patterns of your life.
An important step toward individuation is a willingness to recognize and acknowledge your behavior patterns. Once you begin to work toward your authentic self, you can begin to live as only you can live and be the person you are meant to be."
Read the full article here!
Reflection:
Do you think you are your true self at the moment? How have you worked towards finding yourself?
#Self #Self-Reflection #Mindfulness
@comfortableNight4463 I think that's definitely a tough question. I don't know what my true self is per se. I think I am a slightly different person with each person I am with and when I am by myself, I sometimes feel I am my worst version because that's when I start to think too much and my anxiety gets worse. I like to think that my true self is when I am happiest and having fun with others. I want to separate my true self from my anxious thoughts, but at the same time, they have made me stronger. It's a tough situation!
@fruityPond7887 I totally understand! I also don't have a clear view of who my true self is. I feel like there are different versions of myself depending on the situation I'm in at the moment.
@comfortableNight4463 Exactly! I think we change how we react to certain situations and all of our experiences shape us into who we are today. I don't think we are ever a solidifed version of ourselves.
@fruityPond7887 Well said! I whole-heartedly agree! Our true self is ever-changing.
@comfortableNight4463
That’s a really fascinating question! I would say that during high school especially I did not like many things about myself and I was trying a lot of things in order to find who I was and what made me “me”. During the years I have gone through both positive and negative challenges but in the end it has shaped my sense of identity and I would like to believe I have found my true self. But I think our definition of “true self” changes as we go about life and experience both positive and negative changes and challenges in life.
@professionalVision2624 I agree! Our true self is ever-changing. It helps to identify who we are at the moment so that we can work on ourselves. Thanks for sharing!
@comfortableNight4463
Exactly! I'm happy you understand what I mean :D It's really important to realize that our true self is ever chaning and adaptable <3
@comfortableNight4463
I haven't found my true self. I felt like I am always stuck with my past self. Each day I try to make myself a better and more mature person. It's not easy finding yourself. Finding meaning to everything that is going on in my life. But I know one day, I will be saying to myself. This is me. This is the true me that is not influenced by other people, that is an image somebody wants me to portray. It's a process but I believe it will come. :)
@Jewelmoon17 It will! Figuring ourselves out is a journey that takes time. I wish you the best in finding your true self!