Thrive Global: What Most of Us Get Wrong About Success

"What is success?

I define success differently than many people. I defined it as having the life you want. (The title of this book may have tipped you off.) Seen this way, success implies and subsumes to necessary preconditions: first, knowing what you want; and second, getting it, or most of it, most of the time.

Most people, especially early on in their lives and careers, tend to think of success in financial and material terms. There’s an assumption, well promoted and rewarded in our society, that if you make a good living you are successful.

The people who introduce us to and influence us in society (our parents, teachers, supervisors), reinforce this belief. Basically, the theory goes, if you work hard and you do well, you’ll attain well, position and accolades. That may be true. The problem is that it may also be beside the point. If you’re truly driven by a desire for those things, having them may indeed make you happy. However, if you don’t really care about them - and many people, at their core, really do not - seeking them is a waste of time and obtaining them will, ultimately, be unfulfilling. And, for what’s it’s worth, my opinion is that money is generally a fairly poor proxy for success.

To be clear: I’m not making a value judgment that the equation “success equals money” is morally wrong. As it happens, some of the things I wanted in my life include wealth and the associated material goods it can bring. I’ve also spent my career bringing consumers light entertainment. I haven’t been trying to cure cancer — I know that – and I’m okay with that. So I don’t think there’s anything wrong with superficial goals: indeed, I have many. But this isn't about me. It’s about you, and what you want. Being honest with yourself, as early as you can, that wouldn’t really is absolutely crucial if you are to be successful. When we were young, many of us engaged in an internal game of, “If just get (fill in the blank) I’ll be happy.” In my view, unless you fill in that blank with something that reflects your genuine goals — becoming the CEO of a company, climbing Mount Everest, making a billion dollars, raising a happy family — the sentence will likely turn out to be false. And if you work long and hard to achieve false ambitions, the results will be acutely disappointing. Even worse, at that point it may be too late to do anything about it, because either you’ll be too old to change direction or you’ll be locked into a life and lifestyle the demands that you continue doing what you’re doing. Remember the aphorism: “Be careful what you wish for; you may receive it.” Focus on the thing that’s wrong for you and that focus may indeed just bring it to you."

*The point of me sharing this article is for you to think about your definition of success. Like the article stated, many of us are material driven (even if we don't think we are) in the beginning of our careers or when we are young. It takes some time to realize that not everything is about possessions. I'm guilty of it too! I think that the more I work, the more I could be saving. Of course, it's important to be able to support yourself and to be comfortable. But I want you to remember the things that are irreplaceable: your loved ones, your health, your education, your pets, and your memories. I am currently in a position where I constantly think "I just need to get into grad school and then I will be happy." While that may feel true now, there will always be hardships. I will be stressed with homework once I get there, I will miss my family, and I will probably miss some aspects of not being in school. The reality is, there will always be aspects of every point in your life that you will be unhappy with. That's where we need to redefine success. I hope to continue to work towards success being happiness and health for me. Everything that I hope for will come, but being present is a gift in of itself.*

What does success mean to you? What would you like success to be for you? In other words, how can you change your thinking to allow yourself to become happier?

#Success #Happiness #Goals

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