Self Harm Recovery Daily Check-in : Tuesday, December 1st, 2020
Hello hello beautiful beings <3
Welcome to December !! I hope that you wrapped up November well and are ready for this new month ! As usual, free hugs are here for those who need them. I know that the end of the year isn't always festive for everyone and that's fine, everyone has their own way of dealing with this month of the year.
For today, I would like to talk about letting go. As we move along through life and grow as a person, there are somethings that we just need to let go of in order to go forward and not get stuck in the past. As easy as it sounds, leaving some things in the past isn't always an easy decision, when we're attached to memories, people or places, it can be hard to let them go. Though some say, it's harder to keep holding on than to let go ...
A little quote : You can spead minutes, hours, days, weeks or even months over analyzing a situation; trying to put the pieces together, justifying what could've, would've happened .. Or you can just leave the pieces on the floor and move on. - Tupac Shakur
Check in questions :
1) How are you doing today ? Feel free to share anything that's on your mind !
2) Are you looking forward to this new month ?
3) Can you think of anything that you need to let go of ?
Song recommendation of the day : Levanter by Stray Kids
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1) How are you doing today ? Feel free to share anything that's on your mind !
Job hunting, physical therapy
2) Are you looking forward to this new month ?
No
3) Can you think of anything that you need to let go of ?
I don't have much that is useful. So most everything I guess.
@Flornhope
Hi there !
Oh good luck with the job hunting, if you don't mind me asking, what type of job are you looking for ? I hope that the physical therapy goes well !
I'm sorry to hear that you're not looking forward to the new month. Is there a reason to that or is it more of a 'not looking forward to the future in general' type of feeling ?
Hum I don't know if the things that we 'keep' have to be useful, maybe they just need to be meaningful, if that makes any sense ? Letting everything go sounds a bit intense, though I understand you feeling that way.
Thanks for checking in, take care <3
@Slizzy564 Thank you I need all the luck I can get. I'm going for any job that isn't all that physically demanding. so far the physical therapy is going well. I don't have anything to ever look forward to in the future. That's a good point on stuff to leave behind. although I dont have much for good habits. Thank you again
@Flornhope
Looking for a job can be a long adventure, I'm sending luck your way ;) I hope that you find something that suits your physical abilities ! It's nice to hear that the physical therapy is going well !
Sounds like the future is very foggy to you ! Not having anything to look forward too sounds difficult to deal with.
Hum maybe you have 'good' habits but you don't realize it at the moment ?
@Slizzy564 Thank you Thank you. I probably do have good habits of some kind but I cant think of any.
@Flornhope
You know, a friend of mine at work always says that it's way easier the find our flaws than our strengths, maybe you'll find them one day :)
@Slizzy564 That makes sense. Thank you
1) How are you doing today? - I'm feeling down today.
2) Are you looking forward to this new month ? - Yes, I do love Christmas.
3) Can you think of anything that you need to let go of ? - Past guilt
@Goldcherry2113
Hey :)
I'm sorry to hear that you're feeling down today, is there anything causing this feeling or is it a general mood ? I hope that easier times come for you soon <3
I guess that this month will be pretty exciting then if you like christmas :) What's your favorite thing about christmas ?
Oh past guilt ! That's an important one right there. Guilt can be tough to deal with, it's something that I struggle with for sure. I hope that you can move on from this feeling at some point. Good luck !
Thanks for checking in, take care <3
@Slizzy564
Check in questions :
1) How are you doing today ? Feel free to share anything that's on your mind !
I'm alright today. I passed an exam I had today so I'm happy about that. I'm still trying to figure out how to talk to relatives on seeking therapy.
2) Are you looking forward to this new month ?
Although things are a bit different I really am. I'll be trying to learn more about Paganism and Yule.
3) Can you think of anything that you need to let go of ?
I think I might need to let go how bad I feel when I don't get an A or higher on a test. If I get something wrong it's more important if I learn from that and understand my mistakes. I need to let it sink in that doing your best doesn't mean being the best. I want to let myself and others know that your grades do not define your worth.
@sleepydandelionbby
Hi !!
Oh congrats on passing the exam !! Definitely seems like something that should make you happy, you deserve it :) Opening up to relatives can be eventful, it's nice to hear that you're willing to reach out for help. You're brave in trying to do so ! I hope all goes well !
If you don't mind me asking, in which way are things different for you ? I don't know about that at all, good luck with your research !
Those are very wise words there ! Sounds like you lean towards a perfectionnist sort of attitude regarding your exams. But you worded it pretty well : mistakes aren't mistakes as long as you can learn something from them. It's a positive way of dealing with those mistakes and harder times. And yes, you are not your grades, you are so much more :)
Thanks for checking in, take care <3
hi!!
1) How are you doing today ? Feel free to share anything that's on your mind !
im actually okay today. had online school, drew a lot, had a pretty good sleep. yet, my knee hurts for no reason today, but it didn't bother me much.
2) Are you looking forward to this new month ?
since its december, exactly 1 month before new year, i'd really want to figure out what kind of a person i am and how can i improve in 2021, so yeah, i can't wait to be a new person in the new year, and of corse, also pretty much all the celebrations. i love christmas a lot and even though the pandemic, i'm exited to celebrate it home alone!
3) Can you think of anything that you need to let go of ?
there's A LOT of stuff, so i'll just won't list it all, haha.
@prisonedbear
Hi there !
It's nice to hear that you're doing well ! How's the online schol going ? I know that a lot of people are trying to ajust to it. If you don't mind me asking, what are you drawing ? I'm sorry to hear about your knee. Hopefully it'll pass soon !
Those are deep questions you have there, trying to figure out who we are is a profound question though I guess that it's a good start if you indeed want to improve yourself next year. This new year seems to be a new beginning for you, I hope it goes well ! Celebrating christmas alone is definitely a big change due to the pandemic but it doesn't seem to bother you !
Oh that much ? It's okay if you don't want to list it all ! I hope that you can let somethings go, over the new year maybe ?
Thanks for checking in, take care <3
@Slizzy564
*TW*
1) How are you doing today ? Feel free to share anything that's on your mind !
Not feeling great, but hopeful that if I just follow my schedule I can control the anxiety. I am going therapy tonight with someone who is in danger of doing something fatally irreversable. Its hard to switch off from worrying when you know there is a ticking time-bomb always invisible behind all that you do and try to do. And perhaps that's how the person wants it. Hard to know what is genuine lack of coping skills and what is just manipulation. And whether or not my anxiety is part of the person's goal or not. And I guess it doesn't really matter. On the one hand you have a normal(ish) non-anxious life, but I worry about what would happen if I diligently didn't check my emails outside of the appointed times and then the person ended up dead and I should have done something to prevent it. And I don't even want to go to this therapy session, cos I have my own work to get on top of. But at the same time, I don't want to leave something undone that is for somebody's safety.
2) Are you looking forward to this new month ?
Yes. I hope I can make some changes that will help (Advent and stuff...).
3) Can you think of anything that you need to let go of ?
I mean, probably lots of stuff. Mostly past mistakes I am still carrying. I want to believe "I did the best I could with the tools I had at the time". Only "best" is a dirty word... Its hard to find the balance of taking responsability on the one hand and not torturing yourself forever on the other...
@1morday
Hi there !!
This seems like a very intense situation for you to be in. Having someone with those issues so close to you must be hard to deal with and tiring. I'm sorry to hear that it's affecting your anxiety. Though it's admirable to want to help this person and I understand that you're worried about their safety, you also need to take care of yourself. I don't know about the therapy session but maybe you could find someone to help them ? Someone's life shouldn't depend on only you. I hope the therapy session went okay, you didn't seem to be looking forward to it much. It might not be much but I'm sending hugs your way if you want some.
It's nice to hear that you're looking forward to the month, are there any changes that you'd wish to share with us ?
Hum past mistakes can be heavy, I understand that. I'm pretty sure that you did your best with what you were given. You're thinking about how you could have done things better and that goes to show your good intentions. Sure there's a fine line between responsability and guilt and it can be easy to slip into one or the other. I don't know if this will help but sometimes I like to think that everything is grey and not just black or white. In the same 'mistake' maybe there are things that you are responsible for though that doesn't mean that you have to torture yourself over it.
Thanks for checking in, take care <3
@Slizzy564
Thanks Slizz!!! :)
Just sleeping more, and scheduling more time in my bedroom where I can work without disturbance (computer of personal) :)
@1morday
These changes sound great ! They are simple but will surely be very helpful in the long run you know ? A good sleep schedule and efficient work can really change a day, I hope it works for you :)
@Slizzy564
Hewwoo!
1) How are you doing today ? Feel free to share anything that's on your mind !
I am okay, I think! Quite tired for now, but very happy as I reached my most goals.
2) Are you looking forward to this new month ?
Yeah! I am enjoying this new month and new challenges I setted for myself. I joined some challenged that I consider interesting for me and my selfcare, so...
3) Can you think of anything that you need to let go of ?
Actually yes, but not sure how to describe it.
@inventiveAcai3503
Hey hey :)
Oh could we say that it's a good type of tiredness then ? In the way that you put energy into these goals but was rewarded at the end.
That's a great way to start the month ! It's lovely to hear that you're trying challenges that'll help you and your self care. What type of challenges are they ?
It can be hard to find the right words to express our thoughts. Though I've always thought that sometimes there are things that can't always be worded correctly you know ? If you want to try, feel free but you don't have to of course !
Thanks for checking in, take care <3
@Slizzy564 I think I described my challenges in another place of this platform!
Actually yes, it's a good tiredness :D I am also grateful for sleeping and having snow today!
I am not sure...Maybe my English is not good to describe what I feel.
@inventiveAcai3503
Yes, I read them :) Good luck !
Oh wow you got snow ? Lucky you !! I love it when it snows :)
No pressure, you do as you feel best ! I know it's not always easy to find the right words ... Though if you only worried about the language it's fine, I'm sure we'll manage to understand most of it :)
1) How are you doing today ? Feel free to share anything that's on your mind !
I'm feeling pretty down. I'm trying to not let what people say affect how I feel about my life, but it's just really hard.
2) Are you looking forward to this new month ?
Not really, Christmas time just means my mom will be home more. And the more she's home, the more stressed my life seems to get.
3) Can you think of anything that you need to let go of ?
All of my past
@hay09
Hi !!
It sounds like you're dealing with a lot of criticism lately, that must be hard on you. I can understand that it would affect your mood. Just a gentle reminder that you're perfect just the way you are, no matter what anyone else says. You're lovable and deserve to be loved <3
I'm sorry to hear that your mothers presence means more stress for you. I hope that things can go as smootly as possible. If you need support, we're here for you !
That's a lot to let go of, though indeed, when trying to move forward, sometimes we need to let go of the past.
Thanks for checking in, take care <3
@Slizzy564
1) How are you doing today ? Feel free to share anything that's on your mind !
Low but not suicidal, so I guess that's better than I've been this last week.
2) Are you looking forward to this new month ?
To be honest, no. I just want to curl up in bed and watch movies until it's late enough to go to sleep. Sleep is my big release and I prefer dreaming to waking life right now. Pathetic, I know.
3) Can you think of anything that you need to let go of ?
This idea that I've utterly failed at life. It's not fair. I've accomplished many things and I could do still more.
Thanks for being there.
@thaliomiles
Hi there !! I'm sorry for the late reply !
I'm sorry to hear about the low mood though it's a relief to see that you're not suicidal ! I hope that your mood continues to gradually lift a little bit every week ! It's there anything that's been on your mind that could explain this mindest ?
Hum I wouldn't say it's pathetic, actually I can understand you a lot in this. Sometimes real life is just too much and we prefer to use our time to be confortable in our own environement. What movies do you like to watch ?
That's a deep thought there, though I understand that you'd want to let go of it. On the more positive side, at least you know that you have accomplished things in your life and are willing to do more ! I hope that one day you can be a bit fairer to yourself !
Thank you for checking in, take care <3
@Slizzy564, hello there!
1) How are you doing today ? Feel free to share anything that's on your mind !
I'm okay. i didn't notice this check-in. For the first time, I'm a bit late. 
2) Are you looking forward to this new month ?
Yeah. I'm so excited for the final season of Attack on Titan. 
3) Can you think of anything that you need to let go of ?
Yeah. It's related to fear.
Thanks for the check-in, and take care.
@LovelyOrangeJuice
Hey there !
There's no problem in being late :) Actually I'm a bit late answering so we could say that we're even :) Good to hear that you're doing well !
Oh yeah ! I might have already asked you this (though I'll admit that my memory is failing me at the moment), when is it coming out ? I'm pretty excited for it too !
Do you want to let go of something that you fear or do you want to let go of fear itself ?
Thanks for checking in, take care <3
@Slizzy564
The final season of Attack on Titan is aired on December 7. Additionally, it will be aired on Netflix on December 11.
Letting go of fear itself is impossible. So, I would rather let go of something that I fear right now.
Anyway, you asked me if I bond with my brother over video games in another post. I'll give my answer here instead. Yeah, but our bonding over games isn't as frequent as before. In fact, we also bond over anime. An elder sibling sure has a strong influence over a younger sibling.
See you, and take care.
See you.
@LovelyOrangeJuice
Oooooh I have to check that out ! Can't wait ! :) Thanks for the info !
That sounds pretty fair ! Do you want to share what you want to let go ?
Sure no problem ! It's nice to hear that you still bond over something, even if it's more anime than games nowadays. It's funny that you mentioned bonding over anime, I was wondering whether I could manage to watch to new season of AOT with my brother ! Who is the eldest, you or him ? As for influencing the other, I think it kinda goes both ways or maybe that's just my experience ?
See ya :)
@Slizzy564
@Slizzy564,
No problem!
I'd rather not share my fear.
You could convince your brother to watch the anime, especially if he showed some interest.
My brother is the eldest. You see, we also influence each other. Therefore, what you said about sibling influencing one another does happen.
So, I had fun answering your questions. I'll be reading your next check-in soon. :)
@LovelyOrangeJuice
That's fine if you don't want to share :)
Oh don't get we wrong, he loves AOT, probably more than me actually, we try to read the manga at the same time. Thing is, because of lockdown, I can't see him at the moment and I don't know if he'll want to wait or if he'll be too impatient and start without me x)
Oh my brother is also the eldest ! I think that when you grow up with someone, the influence goes both ways, even if most of the time it's one sided.
Nice to hear that you had fun, I hope that these check ins help you now and again !
