I dont know where else to put this

@Heftyporpoise

Hey, I'm really sorry to hear you're feeling guilty regarding self-harming; it can be really tough and put you in a perpetuating cycle! But as mentioned above, everyone has different reasons as to why they self-harm; nobody is the same. It shouldn't matter how big or small our issue or reasoning is, the fact is that it's OUR issue, it's affecting US, and as a result, this is OUR way of coping. The one thing we all have in common is that this is our way of coping.

Referring to your other post on this topic- there doesn't always have to be a massive or traumatic underlying reason for why we self-harm. At the very basis of this, why ANYONE self-harms include that 1) this is the only coping mechanism we know of at the time of the issue that helps us 2) there's an issue we're facing and all the coping mechanisms we know didn't help us or 3) our emotions were too much to handle and cope with using our old coping skills.

So what if the uderlying reason isn't as big as someone else's? We can't compare our lives and our actions to somebody else's. Say for example, someone walks past a cat and gives it a pat, whereas you walk past the cat and don't pat it. The reason why you didn't pat it was because you have a really bad allergic reaction to csts. Yet we don't often say to ourselves "I feel so bad because I didn't pat it". Really basic and probably poor example, but I hope it gets my message through, at least semi-decently hahaha!!!

And yes, I've felt this same way before! It's a very tough thing to deal with, and I was caught in the cycle/thinking trap for a long time. But I got out of it, and so can you! Maybe speaking to someone about it could help? Or speaking to your mum and telling her how you feel when she says what she says? These are just some suggestions- what do you think about them?

Good luck in this, and remembed that you're not alone. There's people here on this site that would be willing to help. xx