Personal experience with couting days to get clean
I tried to recover for a long time and tried out many methods.
Wanna share my personal experience bc I lowkey wish someone would've given me the advice I had to learn by myself that helped me a lot.
Like most ppl trying to recover, I started by counting the days for how long I didn't hurt myself, even had one of these fancy apps that count for you.
It wasn't successful at all. All I learned over and over again was, that Ill fail again anyways. Bc that's what it felt like. It was unimportant how many days I was able to stay clean, when I relapsed all my efforts where for nothing and I had to start at 0 days again.
It took me a long time to learn that this way of recovering is just not useful for me personally.
Its an addiction I might never fully overcome in my life. That sucks but its a fact. So it was obviously impossible for me to just never do it again from one day to the other.
Understanding that helped me so much more than counting days. Even if I relapsed, as long as I gradually do it less and less, im successfully recovering.
Maybe for some ppl its an effective motivation to count days, and Im happy for you if that the method thats working for you.
Its not the only way to recover tho and one relapse doesn't mean all the efforts that were put in previously where useless.
Lot of love <33
One hour at a time. Be mindful of your thoughts and remove the temptations. Try not to occupy yourself with thoughts of never and forever. Forever does not exist and never is an assumption in a future that does not exist.
Failure is okay but feeling bad for making a mistake is even more harmful. Relapses are normal, the will to get better is all you need. Thinking you have to stop forever while you presently fight the urges makes the task seem impossible. It is those times where you get past the temptations that count, these are the real victories.
Again, take it one hour at a time. Do not resist or give into these urges. The mind contradicts. It does the opposite of what we tell it to do. Fighting it would be like telling you not to think of a purple gorilla. When you fight this thought of a purple gorilla you are constantly reminding yourself of what you are trying to forget.
🙏
@IvanCow i agree. counting the days can just make you feel bad and guilty when you relapse. it makes each relapse feel like a full restart, when really, relapsing is part of recovery. like you said, recovery is relapsing less and less as time goes on- not necessarily being completely clean for the rest of your life.
also, if you've been counting the days, and have been clean for a long time, a relapse could be really demotivating. like, well i lost my streak now, so why even bother keeping it up again? but changing your thinking - instead of "i lost my streak" or "i have to start over now", thinking "this is part of my recovery and i am still recovering. it doesn't mean i had a step back or i'm starting over" - can be much more helpful and motivating in the long term.
<3