*TW* My Story...

One day in Music class I was fiddling with a pencil and for no reason whatsoever I started scratching my arm with it. It wasn't a little, but not a lot. Only one person noticed afterward and asked what was wrong with my wrist. I brushed it off and felt and urge to cry, realizing what I've gotten myself into.

After that I did begin having urges to do it. I did at home several several more times with a pencil for about a week, then I knew I was better than that and needed help before things got worse. It never drew blood and the scratches only lasted a few days but I still had to wear sleeves. So I went to the school counselor on my own two feet and told her everything. I stopped after that and kept going to talk to her for help each week. It was just me and her.

Urges only grew so so so much stronger from there but I stayed clean. About 4 months and 3 weeks came around and I finally told my 3 closest friends. Telling them gave me a strong urge, but I told them what I could and they listened and tried to be supportive. I found out that one of those friends was also battling self harm, so from that day forward we go to each other for help.

I stayed clean for 6 months 1 week and 1 day, then messed it up very very badly for several weeks, using a safety pin that drew blood, much more each time. I finally told friends, then the counselor who was the hardest person ever to tell. We worked hard again, and I'm still clean today. A little over 4 months. My family still doesn't know.