freelancing is depressing

i feel deoressed and suicidal right now because im always been rejected here in the freelancing community, i feel like wherever i go i feel like no on likes me, actually it hurts a lot, because i feel worthless. first when i was studying way back in college and high school, i was been bullied by my classmates and even my teachers, i just ignored and endured it in order for me to graduate. second, in my corporate job, i was always been alienated by my coworkers, i feel invisible and alone when im around with them. sometimes they gossip about me. i endured it for 3years but cant help it so i resigned. after that i planned to become a freelancer, but unfortunately, same situation, i know i can do the tasks, but the problem is i was still rejected and neglected by members here. i try to approach them all the time but ended up being ignored. i feel really hurt honestly because its always like this. i dont know whats wrong with me, thats ehy sometimes im thinking of en.d.ing my life because i feel useless and unloved up to this present.