Marriage
I've been married for 4 years now we been together for 8 years we have been drinking more then ever lately in are life we do acknowledge it and have done our best but we tend to have these arguments a lot lately and I've noticed and same with my wife and I've brought up we should take a break from drinking but she denies it and says if that what I need to do like she doesn't but I do see the bigger picture in the sense that if we both did we would see a brighter picture
This is also my first time doing anything therapy other then having deep talk with close friends
Quit drinking first, and when a problem arises ( which it will) you can emphasize to her that u aren’t the one drinking she is and the problem with you both is the alcohol, this might help her to realize how she also needs to stop
my boyfriend and i quit last year to help my health and our relationship. it’s so easy to fall into drinking all the time and so fun in the beginning. it sounds like you’re ready to mature and go onto the next stwo of your love and marriage. Maybe try to sit down and talk to her more about it in the form of your relationship. personally, the money spent on drinking did help to prevent us from wanting to relapse. once you do all the math and talk about all the other things you could’ve done, trips, savings, etc, it can help put things into perspective. speaking about the how you feel like when you both drink, it causes more arguments and isn’t as fun as it used to be, mention that you’d like to try to come up with some new activities to try out together. walking, painting together, if you have pets play with them more or go to a shelter together. every time you want to drink out the money you were going to spend on the alcohol into a jar/savings account and plan a trip that you can contribute to your sobriety.
there’s probably going to be at least 1 relapse, be ready to handle it and maybe even try the meds prescribed for alcoholism, they make you feel awful which makes it easier to avoid relapse. go to couples therapy and make sure you both are gentle and understanding with each other, keep communicating and after a while it’ll get easier. give her some time, if you don’t think she is willing to quit now then maybe try on your own if you can, drinking alone might not be as fun for her
my boyfriend and i quit last year to help my health and our relationship. it’s so easy to fall into drinking all the time and so fun in the beginning. it sounds like you’re ready to mature and go onto the next stwo of your love and marriage. Maybe try to sit down and talk to her more about it in the form of your relationship. personally, the money spent on drinking did help to prevent us from wanting to relapse. once you do all the math and talk about all the other things you could’ve done, trips, savings, etc, it can help put things into perspective. speaking about the how you feel like when you both drink, it causes more arguments and isn’t as fun as it used to be, mention that you’d like to try to come up with some new activities to try out together. walking, painting together, if you have pets play with them more or go to a shelter together. every time you want to drink out the money you were going to spend on the alcohol into a jar/savings account and plan a trip that you can contribute to your sobriety.
there’s probably going to be at least 1 relapse, be ready to handle it and maybe even try the meds prescribed for alcoholism, they make you feel awful which makes it easier to avoid relapse. go to couples therapy and make sure you both are gentle and understanding with each other, keep communicating and after a while it’ll get easier. give her some time, if you don’t think she is willing to quit now then maybe try on your own if you can, drinking alone might not be as fun for her
