Your Vent:
If you had one thing you could tell that one person, what would it be
@RaeBaeIscrazy08 you did what you wanted , I hope you're happy
@RaeBaeIscrazy08 that I love him
@EmbraceofUnderstanding *loves
@RaeBaeIscrazy08
I wish you knew how much I really loved you. How deeply I believed in what we had-even when it was hard. Even when I was hurting.
I know I didn't always make perfect choices. I know I was struggling. But I let you in, and I believed you'd stay and help me grow. Instead, when things got hard, you left quietly-already drifting toward other people, while telling me to hold on.
What hurts isn't just the leaving. It's the lying. The pretending. The way you made me feel like my gut instincts were paranoia, when they were truth. I didn't want them to be real, so I let myself believe your words instead of my own heart.
I see now: I bent so much of myself trying to fit what you wanted. I broke promises I made to protect myself. I gave up parts of my identity to be "enough" for you. And still, it wasn't safe.
You loved the idea of me, not the reality. I tried so hard to help you understand who I was, what I felt, what I needed. But instead of acceptance, I got pressure-to be more convenient, more stable, less me.
And that's the part that aches the most.
I didn't want perfection. I just wanted to be accepted.
And while it hurts that I didn't get that from you... I am slowly learning that I deserve to give it to myself.
@RaeBaeIscrazy08
Wish we could make this work..but it takes two..
@RaeBaeIscrazy08
I wish you understood how bad your hurting me.
@RaeBaeIscrazy08
it kind of hurt really bad that when I was clearly struggling, and I made it obvious to the world by saying “I’m not doing okay” on my post, and you didn’t respond or check on me. Are we even “close” or are we even “friends”? It makes me feel worthless when I don’t even have people who care about me genuinely.
@RaeBaeIscrazy08
I would tell my favorite person in this whole wide world that I lost communication with I would say, I NEVER STOP LOVING YOU, EVEN WHEN I SAW YOUR TRUE COLORS I KNEW FROM THE VERY BEGGING WHILE EVERYONE ELSE SAW A MONSTER I SAW A HURT DAMAGED SOUL THAT JUST NEEDS TO BE LOVED AND UNDERSTAND YOU, NO MATTER HOW MUCH YOU WANT TO HURT ME, I KNOW YOUR HURTING 10X MORE, DONT WORRY I UNDERSTAND YOU AND I WILL ALWAYS LOVE YOU . ❤️
@RaeBaeIscrazy08
why did u leave its not fair I loved u even though we dated for only 2 weeks but I secretly loved u when I first saw u u were chubby and adorable then u came back 6 months later all skinny and handsome I thought I was gonna not survive and while we were together u were commenting n other girls and I was mad all the time bc I love u I still do even though u r in the foster system and u chose to leave YOU CHOSE TO LEAVE ME and ur sister and I even though we would smoke weed every day to cope with our own pain and now u chose to left she had to go with u why just tell me why was I not good enough bc now I have no context and u leave me here doubting myself all I wanna know is why?
"I trusted you but you didn't deserve that"
