Husband & money
Hello,
I'm in my early 30’s, and my husband is 3 years younger than me. We have been living together for 6 years now and everything is fine except for the financial aspect. I have been paying the rent, food, power, and every single bill for all these years. Sometimes when he remembers he gives me part of the rent money. But I'm getting too tired of this. I feel that I'm his mother!!!
I know that money is not the most important thing, but being realistic I had to work so hard to get where I am. I had stayed at jobs that I hated just because I needed to pay the rent and food. I don't have any problem paying everything, but I feel that I'm working just to pay all of the bills and at the end of the month I'm left with nothing. I'm getting older, and he is too as well; I thought that maybe with time he'd change but after 6 years everything is the same.
Have you ever been in a similar situation? I have talked with him about it and he always says that he'll send/give me part of the bill money, and do it one time and then forget. And I need to remember him every ****** month, and I'm too tired to do it. I'm not his mom, he knows that we need to pay stuff every month if we don't want to be homeless.
I know that with his salary, will not be able to pay for an apartment, and be homeless, or will need to live with someone else. I keep thinking if this is one of the reasons why he stays with me.
If you were me, what do you do?
@yaya001 What exactly does he do with “his” money? Do you have any money at all in the month that you can spend just on your own wants/needs? Do you as a couple have any plan or even fantasy about a better financial life sometime in the future?
@yaya001 I'm really sorry to hear that you're going through such a challenging situation. It sounds like you've been shouldering a significant financial burden for quite some time, and that's undoubtedly exhausting. It's completely understandable that you're feeling overwhelmed and frustrated.
It's important to prioritize your own well-being and communicate your needs openly. Have you considered having a heart-to-heart conversation with your husband, expressing how the current financial dynamic is affecting you emotionally and physically? Sharing your concerns about the ongoing pattern and discussing potential solutions together might be a constructive step forward.
Your feelings are valid, and you deserve a partnership where both parties contribute and support each other. If needed, seeking the assistance of a relationship therapist could provide additional guidance and support.
Please take care of yourself, and I'm here if you need someone to talk to.
