I hate myself to an extreme point, why?

I hate myself for being lazy, for being detached, for being comfortable with my negative thought, for being okay with my self-isolation. I hate myself for the comfort I find in my sadness, for not caring anymore, for the lack of motivation I have, for the negativity I have surrounding me. I hate myself for being scared of being happy, for being scared to find love, for being scared to let others in. I hate myself because deep down I'm alone, scared, and unfulfilled in my life. It is easier to stay in my comfortable depression than it is to face the difficulty to find happiness.