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Ali196
1 3,657 M Seeking Light 2
PathStep 1 Compassion hearts78 Forum posts2 Forum upvotes4 Current upvotes4 Age GroupAdult Last activeSeptember, 2025 Member sinceJuly 11, 2025
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I’ve been silently battling schizophrenia, panic attacks, Social Anxiety and Major Depression Disorder since I was 18 and I’m so tired
Depression Support / by Ali196
Last post
 July 31st, 2025
...See more Disclaimer:English is my second language. I used AI to help me write this so I could express myself clearly Since 2019, when I was just 18, I’ve been dealing with schizophrenia, major depressive disorder (MDD), panic attacks, and social anxiety. It’s been six painful years and I’ve faced most of it completely alone. I started treatment in 2022 and have been on medication since then, but honestly, nothing truly works. The pills might dull some things, but the suffering stays. I see faces that aren’t real. I hear voices no one else can hear. The fear, the confusion, the sadness it never goes away. What hurts most is that no one around me knows. I’ve tried to open up before, but people mocked me. They treated me like I was dangerous or insane like I was some kind of lunatic. After that, I just shut down. I kept everything buried inside. Over time, I developed this deep fear of people. I don’t even know how to explain it anymore. I’m afraid of humans and at the same time, I hate them. Not out of anger, but from how I’ve been treated again and again. It’s made me isolate myself even more. Now, I’m exhausted. Some days, it feels like there’s only one way out and that thought scares me more than anything. If you’re reading this, thank you for listening
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