Skip to main content Skip to bottom nav
Talk to a licensed therapist Wherever you are, whenever you need support. Get matched
Bigoudi07
278 M Embraced 2
PathStep 1 Compassion hearts27 Forum posts2 Forum upvotes4 Current upvotes4 Age GroupAdult Last activeJanuary, 2024 Member sinceJanuary 7, 2024
Bio
Recent forum posts
Bigoudi07 profile picture
Need help please (the sequel)
Depression Support / by Bigoudi07
Last post
 January 17th, 2024
...See more Hello, I hope you are all doing well. Two days ago, I posted a post on here, and I'm grateful for the attention it has garnered and the supportive messages I received below. The problem is that I failed to achieve my goal with my initial post. I want to clarify that my sole aim is to find solutions to my struggles with suicidal thoughts triggered by the challenges of Autism Spectrum Disorder (ASD) and Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder (ADHD), life's contradictions, and feelings of inadequacy due to not knowing which career path to choose at the age of 15 and still being uncertain about my professional future. Lacking life experience, not knowing how to be autonomous and independent, struggling to understand how life works, and find it challenging to communicate with others and understand fully what they are saying. Lacking responsibility, struggling to foresee the consequences of my actions, and finding it difficult to adapt to life's mediocrity. Being never satisfied with myself because I understand that there is some sort of goal in life which is to be perfect, yet paradoxically, the world we live in is profoundly imperfect—a contradiction that I don't comprehend and that is causing me considerable suffering. I have grappled with suicidal thoughts, seeking solutions to cope with all of the challenges brought by all of my problems mentioned above. I appreciate the support and attention received, but I would like to remind you that I am seeking practical solutions rather than just encouraging messages. Thank you for your understanding. 
Bigoudi07 profile picture
Need help please
Depression Support / by Bigoudi07
Last post
 January 16th, 2024
...See more Hello, I hope you are well. I will share a bit of my life story in summary. For those who prefer to skip this part, go directly to the conclusion. I'm not very good at telling stories, so sorry if it might be challenging to read. I was born in 2005 and lived happily until 2013. I was innocent, liked by many, and grew up in a beautiful environment with my parents and older sister. In 2013, my parents decided to move to a neighboring country for financial reasons, despite warnings from my sister. I lived in a village for 4 years, experiencing bullying at school due to my weight. I struggled to adapt, but eventually made friends with Taylor, someone of the same nationality as me. In 2017, my parents separated, and my mom and I moved near the border of our home country. In 2018, I started a new school, but problems persisted. I took boxing classes, but in 2019, I returned to my home country. In 2020, I changed my life, becoming a diligent student. I started high school in 2021, but the following year, I questioned that decision. In 2022, I had to start over in a new school. In June 2023, I was diagnosed with autism and ADHD. In conclusion: Since 2020, I have been struggling with suicidal thoughts due to my difficulty in finding my path. I feel inadequate, lost in career choices at the age of 15. Life's contradictions disturb me, and I wonder why being good doesn't guarantee happiness. These feelings persist, and despite my sister's support, I feel disconnected from life. I seek to be more independent and become a better person. I'm here for further discussion if needed.
Search more from @Bigoudi07
Considering Therapy?
Talk to an expert therapist
Badges & Awards
8 total badges
Hand Shake Linked Chief Chat Reconnect First Post Reaching out First Compassion Teammate
Report an issue
Feel better with online therapy Professional, confidential and affordable. Start today
Talk to a licensed therapist Wherever you are, whenever you need support. Get matched