Need help please (the sequel)
Hello, I hope you are all doing well.
Two days ago, I posted a post on here, and I'm grateful for the attention it has garnered and the supportive messages I received below. The problem is that I failed to achieve my goal with my initial post. I want to clarify that my sole aim is to find solutions to my struggles with suicidal thoughts triggered by the challenges of Autism Spectrum Disorder (ASD) and Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder (ADHD), life's contradictions, and feelings of inadequacy due to not knowing which career path to choose at the age of 15 and still being uncertain about my professional future. Lacking life experience, not knowing how to be autonomous and independent, struggling to understand how life works, and find it challenging to communicate with others and understand fully what they are saying. Lacking responsibility, struggling to foresee the consequences of my actions, and finding it difficult to adapt to life's mediocrity. Being never satisfied with myself because I understand that there is some sort of goal in life which is to be perfect, yet paradoxically, the world we live in is profoundly imperfect—a contradiction that I don't comprehend and that is causing me considerable suffering.
I have grappled with suicidal thoughts, seeking solutions to cope with all of the challenges brought by all of my problems mentioned above. I appreciate the support and attention received, but I would like to remind you that I am seeking practical solutions rather than just encouraging messages. Thank you for your understanding.
@Bigoudi07 So you are feeling frustrated and scared. Is that correct?
If so, those are uncomfortable feelings. Every human must navigate their feelings. There are ways to make the feelings have less of an impact on us in terms of feeling bad.
You said “I understand that there is some sort of goal in life which is to be perfect, yet paradoxically, the world we live in is profoundly imperfect.” It may be true that some people choose to live by some perfect goal. But it is not necessary. I used to want to be perfect at work - the best. There are some things I have learned to do well, maybe better than others in some regard, but I am not the best. I was actually relieved when I let myself be “just ok” instead of perfect. That decision removed a lot of emotional tension for me. So if you have ideas of living up to perfection, maybe you would feel better to just ok.
You wish to solve your problem with ideation. Perhaps think of all the reasons not to. One of the biggest I can think of, there is no way to experience and fix anything in my life with a one way permanent “solution.”
Is this the kind of answer you were looking for?
@Bigoudi07 Most people finish high school at 18 or 19. So I would guess you have a few years to consider a plan for your future. If you are going to college after high school just know that not everyone knows what they should major in. They pick something and sometimes stick with that choice or change it later. So sometimes our answers just have to be experiments instead of a conclusion. It’s a little bit uncomfortable but few of us have easy answers. All of us learn as we go. We plan as much as we can. Most of us also worry if we have planned enough, but it usually isn’t worth the extra worry. It helps to make a plan for the future and check with friends, family or counselors to see if they think it’s a good plan. It can help us relax a little to get their input.