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HopefulCloud00
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PathStep 6 Compassion hearts69 Forum posts1 Forum upvotes52 Current upvotes52 Age GroupAdult Last activeMarch, 2026 Member sinceFebruary 4, 2026
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My family is the reason for my poor mental health but they refuse to accept it
Family & Caregivers / by HopefulCloud00
Last post
 March 14th
...See more Hi, I just signed up today and figured posting here wouldn't hurt since I need some advice.  My family is highly religious and it makes wanting my independence so much more difficult, I'm an adult woman (almost in my mid 20s) with a stable job and income and even then, bringing up the topic of moving out feels so scary and nearly impossible because the last time I did, it resulted in this huge argument where I ended up in tears.  I've been wanting to move abroad for years now, but in my family's eyes, I shouldn't even be thinking of wanting that because religion says it's a sin for an unmarried girl to move out of her family home. And every single time, they tell me how I'm gonna get in these highly dangerous and awful situations and they won't be there to protect me since I'll be far from home; it makes me feel like a horrible person for wanting to leave, and it makes me believe them, I'm tired of being such a doormat, what should I even do? I keep getting told that my life and well-being will be put at risk because I'll be a woman living alone, and that attracts evil people who'll want to take advantage of me and do unspeakable things to me, they think there's no one else in the world who would love and look out for me the way they do, basically saying that me moving out is risking my safety and they're the only ones who will truly keep me safe.  Why do I feel so bad for wanting to be independant, why should I have to be married to leave? It's so unfair, they keep painting the "outside world" as this highly dangerous and hostile place that I shouldn't think about venturing into if I value my life. I've never visited abroad because of this mindset they have. How can I put my foot down and tell them that I'll be able to make it on my own, that I'll move out and nothing bad will happen to me, that I'll be happy and will be able to stay safe even without them.  I'm so easily guilt tripped and it's ruining my life, I can't do what I want because they'll always find a way to talk me down from doing it, they know how to hit me where it hurts, they know I care a lot about their opinion and they know I won't do it if they convince me hard enough. This specific reason has kept me from doing the things I want, from having the life I want, they're so overprotective, it feels like I can't even breathe without their approval, and I know that bringing it up once more is going to cause issues, they'll freak out again over it. I also hate to admit that every time they've talked me down from moving out by framing the world as this extremely evil and hostile place, I believed them and put my plans on hold. 
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