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IdentityCrisisIDRK
2 136 M Embraced 1
PathStep 6 Compassion hearts10 Forum posts2 Forum upvotes2 Current upvotes2 Age GroupAdult Last activeOctober, 2025 Member sinceOctober 3, 2025
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Traumatic past? Or, a challenge.
Trauma Support / by IdentityCrisisIDRK
Last post
 October 4th, 2025
...See more Hello! Im new here and i just wanted to share something. Whenever I was young. I used to have, friends that stay beside me, but looking back at it now. There pretty much a fake, but what happened to me when I was young is just sad. When Covid ended, I ended up becoming the confident cheery and reliable student. Even tho I wasn't the brughttest bulb, I was a good kid. But anyway, when I tried to make friends, it was, hard, I had a good intro yet, no one wanted to be my friend. So I kept going. And since I was getting desperate and tired of trying. I went up close to a friend group and told a friend group leader on where is my friendship bracelet. Since I was getting extremely desperate and really tired of trying. But she said that. Sorry [name] your not in this group, how about you make ur own friend group. Well girl. I tried, I really did try. I tried to.. make friends back then but they just don't want to. That's where my whole point of view shattered. I was left in shambles after that approach. And that point on. I stopped trying. I stopped being confident, cheerful, and just, happy. Because I was confused. Im confused why.. my classmates back then did that to me. Is it because im big? Is it because im too.. idk. Happy? I don't know what I did back then but., just thinking about it, makes me cry. Makes me not want to talk about it from how cruel life joked about when. I couldn't find anyone to talk to. Or let alone be with. So I.. acted being sick. I stopped going to school and pretend sick so I won't accept the harsh truth that. I don't have any shoulder to cry on. So. Yeah, that's what happened, and since I kept acting sick, my grades started to plummet down because I kept missing too many lessons, assignments, and projects. I was literally the backbone of the class. The under performer, the stupid one. Im not.. stupid, just.. struggling guys. Once my mom noticed that i was getting sick too often, she ended up finding out that I was faking it and scolded me, well, that's all I have to say I think, and just to clarify it happened all in the past. I domt remember it until one because of a certain someone who triggered that terrible memory.
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Tbh I don't really know. ( 3rd attempt of making it because it kept crashing)
Trauma Support / by IdentityCrisisIDRK
Last post
 October 4th, 2025
...See more Hi. This is the 3rd attempt of making this *** thread, im so annoyed right now because whenever I speak my mind out. The app keeps crashing. And it might be because its long but it isn't that long compared to my 1st thread. Goodness I just feel like life doesn't want me to get help so I can suffer all the time. But this would be a short one since I don't want to risk my thread being gone again So about my life, it is pretty *** and not. Sometimes I feel happy, sometimes I don't. But what makes me., confused, is that, whenever I hate someone. I just or I domt know if im doing this or its my stupid brain because it turns my biggest enemy. The person who personally hirt me and caused me to do self harm. Just.. turned into my identity.. it sucks, really. Because not only am I uncomfortable. But im also vulnerable. It just sucks really. But what I want to say the most is that,, that person who hurt me? Also hurt everyone around him. Not only is he controlling but he is also stupidly prideful and annoying. I just wonder if he's those steoryipical pick he's or an actually bad person. Because what he did to all of us made my blood.. boil. He caused someone to nearly faint from how tired she is from practicing. And one person almost broke down mentally from how unbelievably personal his attacks were when we do the slightest mistake. And I wonder, is this how leaders really act? Personally hurting someone, pushing them to there limits (im a bad way) barely giving us support and having 0 in between practices just.. look and sound bad, like the kind of bad where you don't even want to talk or think about it for how messed up that is. Anyways, I think that's all for today now. I just wanted to speak my mind in a more simpler way so that the app one crash again. Hopefully you understand what im dealing with.
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