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ItzNikito
3 174 M Embraced 1
PathStep 2 Compassion hearts30 Forum posts4 Forum upvotes20 Current upvotes20 Age GroupAdult Last activeAugust, 2026 Member sinceJanuary 10, 2026
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I'm very lost.
Trauma Support / by ItzNikito
Last post
 August 13th
...See more I am in a severe emotional crisis right now and I feel completely trapped, isolated, and overwhelmed. I carry a huge amount of deep, long-term trauma—including severe childhood abuse, ra**, torture, and intense bullying—on top of losing my mother to cancer which was my only Family now I'm completely by myself. I also suffer from BPD, severe depression, and agoraphobia that keeps me inside the house. Because of all this trauma, my nervous system is in constant survival mode, and I know I can be emotionally overwhelmed or difficult to deal with even though I'm trying hard not to be. Recently, my relationship reached a breaking point. My partner sent explicit pictures to another man a while ago, breaking my trust. When I expressed my hurt, instead of offering reassurance or understanding, she dismissed my feelings, treated my pain like an annoyance, and blamed my mental health. I also saw her complaining to her mom about having to live with me. Right now, I am stuck in a state of constant panic and terror. I feel helpless, unloved, and dependent on her for daily things because I can barely leave the bed. I have no money, no support system, and I feel completely stranded inside my own head and home. I desperately need help learning how to ground myself, process this trauma, and find safety but it feels like I'm holding myself back. Or something doesn't let me. I feel so insecure even sharing this now here.
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Hey
Newbie Hub / by ItzNikito
Last post
 January 18th
...See more Hello guys, I don't know what's wrong with me, I used to be very funny and a good company for others but I lost all of my emotions, nothing brings joy to me anymore and I can't remember the last time I was happy, the smallest tasks are to difficult for me and currently it's very difficult for me to even leave the bed, I constantly ask my partner if they can bring me a cup of juice because I can't even do that of course that is super annoying for my partner and so I'm met with constant accusations of me being either lazy or treating them like a Butler, I tried to explain myself but it's pointless. Currently we are having to change from work from home to the office again which is very difficult for me because I was sedentary since covid so my lower back and my legs hurt immensely from walking. Nothing makes sense to me anymore and I'm super embarrassed for all of this because I wasn't like this before. I don't know what to do anymore nor what I need. I don't have any Family that can guide or help me either. I just want to be happy again. I feel like I'm falling apart. I hope that someone might be able to point me in the right direction. I'm really lost. Thank you for reading.
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