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KanekiKen6661
1 750 M Little Steps
PathStep 6 Compassion hearts25 Forum posts3 Forum upvotes5 Current upvotes5 Age GroupAdult Last activeOctober, 2026 Member sinceApril 11, 2019
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looking for other asexuals for support
LGBTQ+ / MOGII Support / by KanekiKen6661
Last post
 9 hours ago
...See more Hi everyone! I've started to think I might be on the asexual spectrum. I do enjoy having sex sometimes, most of all by myself, but I don't really feel sexual attraction, or very little of it. I had to break up with my long term boyfriend over my supposed low libido because it was so tiring to be expected to have intercourse when I wasn't feeling like it to keep the peace. We tried opening our relationship but unfortunately it didn't work for us. How did you realize you were asexual if you're not sex repulsed? I feel romantic attraction and I would like to find a partner in the future but I'm really scared of having the same issue and I would like to give some kind of heads up if i do meet someone i want to be with.
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TW: assault - Questioning if I experienced assault in my past long term relationship
Women's Issues / by KanekiKen6661
Last post
 October 16th
...See more Hi everyone, I've just recently broken up with my long term boyfriend of 10 years and I'm reevaluating some aspects of our relationship. One of the reasons we broke up was because of our differences in libidos. I don't want to be intimate often and currently I think I might be ace (in the gray zone, I do sometimes feel physical desire and like to engage in intimate connection), while he has a much higher drive. We were long distance, so we could only see each other for a couple of days a week or every two weeks. When we met he would immediately be on me and I wasn't happy about it, we talked it out and he then began waiting half an hour before trying to progress things. Problem is during those 30 minutes I could feel that he was not listening to anything I said and was only looking forward to doing it. It really hurt me because I felt like he was with me just for physical reasons. During all these years I always said yes even if I wanted to say no because I knew that if I refused he would sulk all day and it would ruin the little time we had together. I didn't think about how it would ruin my view of our relationship and most of all the intimacy that we had. I couldn't enjoy our kisses and cuddles because I was always scared that they would develop into something more. I know that I'm lucky and I could have had a much worse experience, but thinking about it all always leaves me with a bad taste in my mouth. I really don't think that he was hurting me on purpose, and we broke up amicably, but I still feel so icky about it all. I don't know if I'm overreacting, since in the end I did say yes, though it was clear that I wasn't enjoying it. I just feel so bitter thinking about all of those times I felt miserable in the moment while he didn't really try to make me feel comfortable. I can't say that it was all bad, I still had a lot of great times with him, I'm just trying to reconcile with this part of our relationship.
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