Skip to main content Skip to bottom nav
KeepMovingForwardToday
90 M Embraced
PathStep 1 Compassion hearts7 Forum posts4 Forum upvotes0 Current upvotes0 Age GroupAdult Last activeMarch, 2018 Member sinceFebruary 23, 2018
Bio
Recent forum posts
KeepMovingForwardToday profile picture
Help, advice needed. I do not want to be the other woman any longer or should I wait?
Relationship Stress / by KeepMovingForwardToday
Last post
 March 16th, 2018
...See more Hi, new here. I will try to make a long story as short as possible in order to get to the main point. I'm currently involved in an affair. I'm the other woman. The MM in question has been in my circle of friends for almost 7 years. He watched me make up and break up with my previous boyfriend and be single. He became married a few years ago and he was less involved in our friend group. 1 1/2 years ago my friend and I ran into him and his friend. To make a long story short we all started hanging out again as friends. His gf (wife now) never went out with him or was very social the entire time we were friends. I know thats never an excuse but It made the thought of her less present in my mind, at the time. One thing let to another and he confessed the feelings he had always had for me. We kissed. Kissing led to flowers, which led to texing/phone calls, concerts and fun activities until I was deep into something. You don't always choose who you love. 3 weeks into this affair... he told me his wife was pregnant (2 months pregnant to be exact) 1 month in I tried to break it off or asked him to get a divorce. He apologized for pulling me into this complicated situation but stated he had always cared about me... its just horrible timing but that he would not let me go. I told him I could not continue in this situation as it was eating at me and it was very wrong. I was unsuccessful... days later he had convinced me he would leave once the baby was born. Months later his wife found out. She would not leave him given the pregnancy and he did not leave her. Months flew by. He continued to tell me he would and refused to stop speaking to me. Baby came and baby is here almost a year and 1/2 later. We see each other less and less every day. Texting is rare and phone calls often go unanswered or returned days later. He continues to go on family trips and spend time with his family. I expect this but for the past 6 month I have been an emotional reck. I cry randomly, I pick fights with him almost everytime we speak. He keeps telling me to stay positive, that everything is so complicated. He does not want to loose his child, mess up his job or ruin other peoples lives.... He asked me to wait 2 years. For the past 4 months he only is able to see me for about an hour every 2 weeks, usually he wants to have sex and spend a bit of time with me but then has to return home/work. I'm shaking as I type this b/c I know I have to end this bullshit that I've put myself in. I do not get anything out of it. I have tried for months to end it. The longest I've lasted is maybe a week. I've been seen a therapist for a few months to sort out my thoughts, feelings of guilt, sadness etc. It helps but it has not given me the strength I need to end it and stick to that. I guess I'm looking for some guidance on what to do. Do I move forward. Do I believe him and wait 2 years? Sorry about not having much organization to my thoughts... my brain is truly all over the place. thank you
Search more from @KeepMovingForwardToday
Community updates
Talk to an expert therapist
Hi, my name is Melissa and I am a Licensed Professional Counselor.  I hope...
Talk to Melissa Now
Badges & Awards
5 total badges
First Post Hand Shake Reaching out First Compassion Forum Friend
Report an issue