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NocelIspum
2 93 M Embraced 1
Just trying to improve
PathStep 1 Compassion hearts13 Forum posts2 Forum upvotes5 Current upvotes5 Age GroupAdult Last activeNovember, 2025 Member sinceNovember 3, 2025
Bio

I draw and struggle with BPD

Recent forum posts
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spiral struggles
General Support / by NocelIspum
Last post
 November 3rd, 2025
...See more my partner is watching movies with his friend  is gonna spend the night there and isnt replying since  well movies  makes me feel miserable though  miss him  we always spend the nights together and now i have to go to bed without even a goodnight and it makes me feel like im gonna have a panic attack  i get even get my work done i cant even focus  i feel like crying and like i cant breathe i just want this to be over 
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Not sure how this works - borderline personality advice
General Support / by NocelIspum
Last post
 November 4th, 2025
...See more Just really need advice or anything...  Worried I might be splitting on my partner, or my own attachment issues are causing me to spiral.  I'm jealous that he's out and not texting me, even though consciously I know he isn't cheating. But like, his not texting makes me have near panic attacks and causes me to spiral with terrible paranoid thoughts. I NEVER tell him about my irrational thoughts, and never lash out at him. I feel terrified he hates me, or that he wants to leave me, that I'm too much, too emotional, and it makes me hate him even though I know I don't, and it's just my brain freaking out. Then, at the same time, I blame myself and wonder if I'm a burden on him and deserve to be hurt.  I just don't know how to stop myself from having these thoughts. It's gotten so bad that I had a panic attack that has made me ache in pain today. I love him, and I consciously can understand he isn't doing anything wrong, which is why I do not tell him. I just want to stop acting like this. I want to get better. 
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