Skip to main content Skip to bottom nav
Nyala
326 M Embraced 3
PathStep 10 Compassion hearts16 Forum posts6 Forum upvotes9 Current upvotes9 Age GroupAdult Last activeMarch, 2019 Member sinceMarch 1, 2019
Bio
Recent forum posts
Nyala profile picture
I am terrified of being judged/blamed
Trauma Support / by Nyala
Last post
 March 9th, 2019
...See more So I was raped in November of 2014. Cause of the circumstances I kept denying that it was a trauma and refused to see how much it affected me, untill a few months ago when it all came crashing down on me. I am still terrified of telling people how/where/when. Even my own therapiat cause I'm scared I'll be blamed saying it was my own fault for not being careful. I want some validation, and will tell you about it. So I was on a website called Darkside for the kink community. There I connected with a man over 10 years older than myself. We started talking and made plans to meet up in a public place. I told my friend about where I was going and took other precaustions. Everything went fine and we decided to meet up again for a BDSM session with me, him and his submissive. On the day when he had picked me up at the train and we enter his apartment there is a person there who is not his submiaaive. He'd invited a second dominant person and I was immediately very quiet and subdued. Completely stunnedle at the situation. After this came a number of instances where I wasn't asked, and couldn't say anything because I was either gagged or felt to nervous too. I missed the laat train back home and had to spend the night. I remember feeling more nauseous and sick than ever before. What was the worst for me was he never asked if I was okay with unprotected sex so I had to taake a day afterpill and he gave me Chlamydia. I've never told anyone the full story.
Search more from @Nyala
Community updates
Considering Therapy?
Talk to an expert therapist
Badges & Awards
12 total badges
Hand Shake Linked Quintet Chief Chat Reconnect First Post Reaching out Helping out First Compassion Meet & Greet Forum Friend Strong Bond I
Report an issue