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SayWhaaat
1 232 M Embraced 2
PathStep 1 Compassion hearts53 Forum posts12 Forum upvotes37 Current upvotes37 Age GroupAdult Last activeJuly, 2026 Member sinceJuly 2, 2026
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Intrusive Thoughts
Self-Esteem / by SayWhaaat
Last post
 July 6th
...See more Unsure what category to post this in so I figured self esteem would work since it makes me feel like an absolute monster. Every night as I lay in bed, my mind feels dominated by a version of me that I have zero control over. Terrible thoughts begin to spill into my head and I can't seem stop them. They're usually back to back, jumping erratically from my kids getting hurt in all kinds of horrendous ways to myself being in dangerous situations. It feels like I am watching from above as this gruesome movie plays and I am forced to watch. My heart will start to miss beats as I cry my eyes out to these thoughts that don't feel like mine. I could never imagine such things all on my own. I am a good person with so much empathy it is a legit problem. When I am done crying, I get really angry at the intrusiveness of it all. I struggle to understand what is happening. All I can do is use the thoughts I can control to shout at this other version of me, I will tell it to STOP!.. but then I can't predict or anticipate what those intrusive thoughts might say next. I can argue with this thing for hours. It feels like I have another person living inside my head. It would be anyone's instinct to seek help. I know this. But believe me when I say.. these thoughts are incredibly "Stephen King", I would and could never openly tell people they're thoughts that originated from somewhere deep in my mind. I am looking to understand what is happening, solutions to regain control, or people's stories (especially if you sought help).
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A universal pattern of no respect?
Relationship Stress / by SayWhaaat
Last post
 July 3rd
...See more It doesn't matter who it is, but everyone that has ever crossed my path in life seem to have little or no respect for me. As a result, I am a very lonely person because I expect fairness and truth. I am neurospicy so I know i see things differently in great and excruciating detail.. but I also know I am kind with bounds of empathy.
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Technology.. Yay.
Newbie Hub / by SayWhaaat
Last post
 July 8th
...See more I wrote a super long post that took a good chunk of mental energy to compose.. then it disappeared when I hit post, ughh. Figured i would just say hey, for now.
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