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Wanderwoman14
113 M Embraced 1
PathStep 15 Compassion hearts5 Forum posts11 Forum upvotes4 Current upvotes4 Age GroupAdult Last activeNovember, 2018 Member sinceOctober 25, 2016
Bio

I enjoy photography and all the DIY projects on Pintrest I can get my hands on. I enjoy my job because I am good at it and I am paid well, but I would rather be a livestock farmer.

Recent forum posts
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Does anyone ever feel like this?
Depression Support / by Wanderwoman14
Last post
 May 11th, 2017
...See more Does anyone ever feel like not making that turn in your car or not hitting your breaks? Just to keep going into a ditch or a tree? I don't have a death wish, I truely do love life and what it has to offer (just not most of society). But, does anyone ever feel like this or feel like trying this to have an excuse to get away or "relax"? I feel like if I take time for myself, I'm seen as selfish, because that has been said to me many times before through my high school days. Being an adult now, I know that I have the ability to take time for myself btu I can't shake the feeling that the people around me will be looking at me like I'm selfish or crazy. I love going to the Light Center in Asheville, NC to just meditate. But no one except my sister understands, and she's moving to Portland Oregan in a few months. Doesn't anyone else feel like this?
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Hello All
Depression Support / by Wanderwoman14
Last post
 May 14th, 2017
...See more Hi, my name is Lindsay. I have recently stopped taking [medication name and dosage expunged by Forum admin ladylazarus 1971] daily for 2 years... don't worry.. i didn't cold turkey it. Took me 5 months to wean off of it) and I think this is where this anger is coming from possibly. I've always been the quiet, passive person who could let things go and move on. But now, it's like I "woke up" and realize that the world (or more-so the people in the world) are completely idiotic and I am sick of it. I yelled at a man (he is in his late 40's and I am in my mind 20's) yesterday because he kept talking about how terrible this work meeting was going to be and how he didn't understand it and I tried to explain why HR was having this meeting but he kept talking over me just saying the same thing over again. So... I told him that he needed to shut up and deal with it. He looked surprised I would say something like that but I told him that there was no point in talking to him anymore if he was just going to talk over me. He said "I'm sorry" and walked away. I use to feel terrible about even thinking something like that. But afterwards, I didn't care, just kept working. I've been thinking about it some since then and feel a little guilty because he was just trying to be friendly, but I still don't care as much as I think I should. Apart from that, I find myself feeling like I'm about to explode trying to refraine from telling someone that they are stupid. I keep thinking of ways that I can find something to destroy, a tree to take an axe to, etc. I use to cut my upper thigh occassionally and that made me feel better (like I was releasing this pent up energy and that i could finally relax) but I can't do that anymore. I just know that I feel usless most of the time and that I don't feel like my life is going anywhere and then I get really upset and angry about it and need to take it out on something. I've never hurt people or animals, nor do I intend to. I'm just... tired I think. Tired of not saying what's on my mind and not being able to say what's on my mind wothout getting interupted or or disrespected by someone and feeling like shit after and like I've done somethinng wrong for thinking or saying something.
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Not so great new beginnings
Depression Support / by Wanderwoman14
Last post
 May 14th, 2017
...See more Hello.. I'm new to this site so bare with me. In July my mother passed away from cancer. she was diagnosed and then almost exactly a year later passed away. I just moved to a new city thinking that being around friends would help me find something but I drink more and cry more and crave sleep. I moved into an apartment alone ( and am now moving out to stay with friends). I wake up sick, I cannot eat a full meal, and sometimes when I'm driving, I think of what it would feel like to just slide off the road. But I don't because I know it would burden so many others. So, I continue on and cry.
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