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bubbleWater7346
34,347 M Determined Treads 5
PathStep 3 Compassion hearts433 Forum posts22 Forum upvotes10 Current upvotes10 Age GroupAdult Last activeFebruary, 2020 Member sinceOctober 5, 2015
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I feel like I'm going to burst
Depression Support / by bubbleWater7346
Last post
 February 21st, 2017
...See more It's been a while since I felt this powerless and useless but I feel my frustrations and anger just building up. I just want to let it all out but I have no way. I just want to punch something and yell. Everything seems to go wrong when I try my best. Everything about me seems to be wrong with what the world requires of me. Although the world does require a stepping stool for people so maybe I have fulfilled my requirement? The thing about this is I've always been a mellow and calm person. I never swear, and never punch things but as things just continue to pile on I'm just ready to break and explode. The only other time this happened was back when I was a kid and couldn't handle things anymore and unfortunately I exploded. It was a short explosion but right after that I went back to the emotionless person I have become. My frustrations just keep growing every week and I don't know how I'm going to handle it. At some point my bottle of emotions is going to become full and I won't have room to store anymore.
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Trying to find my way...
Depression Support / by bubbleWater7346
Last post
 February 18th, 2017
...See more It seems like I keep hitting a low in my life at every step I take. I've tried being positive and just waiting as most people have suggested on here, unfortunately my luck just seems to draw more and more bad things to me. A brief blurb on what I'm going through but aside from poor relations with my family in barely even 2 years everyone I've ever talked to has just cut me out completely. This lesson taught me that people aren't capable of being friends with each other unless they can offer something in return. For my situation I was unable to offer any more then I've already given out to people so they just dropped me or stepped on me. I've been suggested to find a girlfriend, which is pretty hard when I don't even have friends. I was suggested therapy which being a poor university student (long story as well) I cna't afford it. I've tried meditation and talking to my school councellor and that just made me feel worse at times. How do people just cope through all the bad things that always happens? I've been waiting all my life for things to get better so do people reccomend I just wait longer despite being able to barely hold on right now? I miss knowing people cared for me, I missed having goals and a passion. Slowly I'm forgetting what it feels like to be happy.
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