Trying to find my way...
It seems like I keep hitting a low in my life at every step I take. I've tried being positive and just waiting as most people have suggested on here, unfortunately my luck just seems to draw more and more bad things to me.
A brief blurb on what I'm going through but aside from poor relations with my family in barely even 2 years everyone I've ever talked to has just cut me out completely. This lesson taught me that people aren't capable of being friends with each other unless they can offer something in return. For my situation I was unable to offer any more then I've already given out to people so they just dropped me or stepped on me.
I've been suggested to find a girlfriend, which is pretty hard when I don't even have friends. I was suggested therapy which being a poor university student (long story as well) I cna't afford it. I've tried meditation and talking to my school councellor and that just made me feel worse at times. How do people just cope through all the bad things that always happens? I've been waiting all my life for things to get better so do people reccomend I just wait longer despite being able to barely hold on right now?
I miss knowing people cared for me, I missed having goals and a passion. Slowly I'm forgetting what it feels like to be happy.
@bubbleWater7346 From what I know in life, waiting for things to change is not going to help, we have to make some changes. I have depression as well, still if we keep letting it take over it might feel over. Try to make small changes than big ones like relationship, friends, studies etc. Try to incorporate something new everyday in your life as you've metioned you have goals and passion that is something which can help you a lot when it comes to changes.
Try to listen to new musics, get a new hobby, or just spend have some time for yourself you might need the last one more. From everything you've been through you have always survived and that is an achievement.
At times you just have be someone you always want to be.
People who left you, forget them maybe they were in your life for a lesson, and when things don't work maybe you are putting energy into something you don't have to.
I am pretty sure you have lots of exploring to do than worry over what has happened in the past.
Hugs my friend:) I hope you make through your hard time and be who you are in every way<3
It's weird but everytime I've been making changes something always happens to crush me. Usually big things too just when I feel like I'm getting use to things. A good example is after falling behind a year I finally made a new group of friends. Eventually we did a group project together for a class and they decided they wanted the easy way out and shoved all the work on me. Realizing this I became the group leader and delegated roles since I didn't want to do their work for them. They did such a poor job that didn't follow the project guidelines so I had to redo everything for them. (I told them multiple times to follow the guidelines) Eventually I told my prof, they went behind my back and now we don't talk anymore.
Just one of many examples of me finally settling in with a new group of friends and now I have to see them everyday because they're in my classes.
@simplelife2468
@bubbleWater7346 Concerning group projects, i think they ought to responsible even if it is grup, team work is best, if they did a poor job that is totally on them, also not likes to accept mistakes so I think this one falls on them no matter how you look at it. You should not let such incident bother you as these things happen in college if you keep focuing on it you might be pulled down by it, let it go. Focus on yourself while dealing with such moments.
Even if changes gets crushed you should not let that stop you as everyone experiences those moments, if college life is tough on you maybe step back and take some time to figure how to move on through it, your studies are more important than some people who make you feel bad.
Work it step by step and don't be down hearted if you get stuck or fall back, you will eventually make through it.
The problem is no matter who I have in my group they always do stuff like this to me. While all the other groups they're with they close friends so they actually work together. Because of these groups my grades are negatively effected since there is only so much I can do alone. Doing a project that is on par with a group of 5 by myself is too difficult to handle.
I already have been in 6 different groups in 2 years, each one of them made me do all or most of the project. My projects have always been one of the worst ones in my class because 1 person can't equal the work load of 5. And telling my profs hasn't been much help. I'm at the point where I may just ask to do projects alone since I'm pretty much doing that right now
@simplelife2468
@bubbleWater7346 As I've gotten older, I learned that friends come and go and it is hard to have a true friend. People indeed get older and as they establish their own lives sometimes decide they don't need their once close friends anymore unless it is of an asset to them. It hurts a lot b/c you remember all the fun times together, but you have to move on and establish your own life. Family is also difficult. Nobody is perfect, but some family members like to think they are and compete w/other family members. Or, some parents like to live their dreams through their children, which causes so much stress and insecurity on a child. There are so many issues that arise w/families everywhere so you have to realize you are not alone. What to do about that stress? Be the bigger person and go on w/your life as you choose. A lot of those dysfuntions in a family are all insecurities and self consciousness. You are in college? That is great! Continue w/school and make a career for yourself! Stop downgrading yourself as though you are hopeless. You are still young and can make a great future for yourself. Don't consider the ones who criticize you b/c they are just jealous. Look for company that is positive and find some hobbies that you like. Concentrating on the past will not help you. I hope you learn to love yourself b/c I think that is one of the issues. You are a great person w/so much potential. :)
I think my main issue it people always move on and find their own group of people which I am totally fine with. The fact that I still haven't found my group of people is a terrible feeling. It's hit me incredibly hard this year and the last knowing all the people who I was close with ended up being rude jerks. The lessons that I have learned from these type of people is I'm not worth getting to know.
Family wise is a bit more difficult and honestly it shattered my self confidence. Growing up I would love going to school since it got me away from being at home. It also stopped me from negative thougths thus making me crave a genuine friendship.
School might be hard to surround me with good people because my program is small with only 80ish students so you know everyone. Apparently everyone is an obnoxious brat that has some God complex going on thinking they are better then everyone else. I've seen them directly talking down to my profs just because they didn't agree with the prof. I've tried out of school activities and it just isn't my place. As much as I tried socializing at these school events I never really clicked with anyone.@TransAm85
@bubbleWater7346 try to love yourself, i know it can be hard but trying to love yourself will help you so much
@bubbleWater7346
I wish I could give you a big hug. A really big hug.
I don't know how you feel, but the thing I do know is what it feels like to be shattered by people whom you trust. It's hard to find close friends that you can trust, even finding people who are in a similar position.
But,
You have something that evolved from all of this. It's being independent and strong.
Since you said your program is very small, it may limit the amount of people you can talk to. Maybe look outside of your school. And I don't necessarily mean after school activities. But something not related to school at all.
Thing's like volunteer, language cafes, or maybe travel or volunteer abroad.
I know that university is expensive, so here are some ideas~~
* Learning a new language and finding people to talk online (phone, skype, face to face, language cafes, etc)
* Volunteer - even in the comunity or a city close by so you can eet different people (homeless shelter, senior homes, teaching children English) (children will bring you hapiness, they are pure souls~~~
And sometimes you look for people who are similar to you, but don't be afraid to loo for people who are the exact opposite of you, sometimes they are treasure that you could miss
Another big hug and best wishes to you!!!
@bubbleWater7346 I know this feeling when your life is really overwhelming and you want it to get better very quickly because it seems like you can't cope with it any more. You want some magical wizard to come and solve your problems because you have tried to do it and nothing you have done worked.
That's what I dream of very often. I want somebody else to help me. But then I realize that whether I like it or not, I am the person you can improve my life. So all I can do is to take small steps everyday and create my own luck!
