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calmOcean7756
1 96 M Embraced 1
PathStep 1 Compassion hearts8 Forum posts2 Forum upvotes0 Current upvotes0 Age GroupAdult Last activeMarch, 2021 Member sinceFebruary 27, 2021
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Hurtful words after creating boundaries, lost
Family & Caregivers / by calmOcean7756
Last post
 March 7th, 2021
...See more My significant other and I came to the conclusion months ago that he, his daughter, and I moved in way too fast together. (It’s been 1.5 years) we have had ups and downs in every way possible, financially (me carrying a good bit for too long), expectations, boundaries, etc. I feel we are a great team but always whenever an argument has taken place it stems from a question or comment I ask him about his daughter. Her and I have a good relationship but due to several arguments in the past few months (turns into yelling, namecalling, out-downs, attack of character) all of which my significant other does. I have thrown up things in the past such as going into debt to provide for all of us when he couldn’t (not in those words). Our last blow up led me to calling my mother before work, crying off and on for the whole weekend, telling everyone my business (my parents are done w him bc he called me a f**** c*** something he said he wouldn’t call me again bc I set that boundary back in may when I stopped drinking for the second time -9months and counting) we both are finding that we have ptsd from our past we never healed from, both seeking therapy, his daughter wants to go but he procrastinates on everything...and the past 2 weeks that we haven’t really talked bc we’re both avoiding having a sit down talk, his daughter has been super chipper, speaking up, being disrespectful...not the kid I’ve been living with for 1.5 years. And I don’t know what to do bc I’m ready to say screw this. His daughter is never deprived of anything especially love and affection from her father which I’ve said to him many times (sorta joking) that she gets more affection than me. He barely touches me. Everyone says I should move (everything is mine) I feel that he stuck by me when I was actively drinking and at times shouldn’t have, but a tiny part thinks it can change. I don’t know if it will bc he has a problem following through as a parent, choosing my side over a 10 year and always getting defensive when his daughter becomes a topic of discussion
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