ceceiliac Member Profile

...See more Me and my ex were together two years ago, but split, and about 6 or 7 months ago, we started to become close again. I have had a really rough year, and in November, I was put under suicide watch and had to be put into a psychiatric hospital. My ex boyfriend was very kind and supportive, and would write me letters, call my mother everyday to ask how I was, and even came with her the day I was discharged. We started dating shortly after I had gotten out of the hospital. Things had been going good, but we would argue a lot, from things that mainly stemmed from my lack of self worth, which definitely put a strain on our relationship. There were also times when I really scared him with my panic attacks, or sometimes he would be holding on to me, and I felt like dead weight. Eventually, my boyfriend had asked for a break, which really wasnt a break because we would still spend time together. On March 4th, he broke up with me, and has changed his words around many times. Hell say he doesnt want to be in a relationship, and I know he has his own major family issues going on right now, but he also doesnt handle his emotions very well, and has said some stuff since the breakup that has hurt me. Theres been drama about him saying he never cared about me and was cheating on me, to other girls texting me on his phone which ends up being a lie, and all this other bs that is not true at all. I miss him so much though, and though Im doing no contact, it hurts so much. I was just put back into the hospital on suicide watch, and was there for about two weeks. I realize he has his own demons hes fighting, as do I, and I need to truly work on myself, as does he. But I truly want nothing more than to be with him.

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